One thing springs to mind when I read the last part of this, no man is an island. Harry would never have won if he hadn't had the others. Also, I liked the earring polishing. It reminds me of something someone I knew used to say. "If I'm gonna get run down by a bus, I'm gonna look damn good doing it."
Author's Response: Very Luna ;) Thanks a million for your review :D
What a lovely story you have here.
I liked how you immediately tackled the issue that they don’t actually know whether it’s the “Final Battle.” It always annoys me when all the characters in a fic speak about the Final Battle like they’re in the fandom or something. The “meeting at dawn” part was slightly cliché, but it’s a good opening none the less.
And then there’s that great line: “If I’m going to die I might as well do it in style.” Very cool. I was a bit thrown off by the “polishing the earrings,” though. I’ve never heard of anyone doing that, so it mystified me. I also like this line: “I don’t know how I would survive if I felt like them.” It’s a perfect expression of the entire theme and mood of this story.
The inclusion of her observations of the ant was also wonderful, because it shows the reader that she was calm enough to notice details and have vague thoughts about them; she’s not intense, hyped-up. I really like that idea of strength and calm from grief. It’s very inspirational. The symbol of the snowdrops and the imagery are just great in conveying it, too.
The narration of how she dealt with grief wasn’t as good, though. I think it would have worked better a true flashback, because you could have shown readers what she was doing and thinking and feeling rather than just describing it in her own words.
Harry…I’m of mixed feelings. He’s not by any means a mopey character, but I can see him worrying a lot like he did in GoF, because he’s a “live in the moment” kind of guy. When there’s a sudden emergency he’s your man, but anticipation throws him off. In this way I think you characterization was great. I don’t think anything about it has to be changed.
Hannah was also good. In a way, it’s very Hufflepuff of her to help Harry out by telling him that he shouldn’t dwell on it. And besides, I’ve always thought that Hufflepuffs had a steel core under their nice exteriors. It’s perfect that Hannah turns out to be a survivor.
This could have been more fleshed out, but I enjoyed it. I didn’t see one grammar error! Good job.
Knight of the Turnip Table
Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much! I'm glad that you liked Harry, I was a bit worried about my characterization of him, becuase I've never written him before! (And I haven't written him since) I'm a huge fan of Hufflepuffs. We don't get to see them a lot, but there has to be some more to them. Just becuase their not in Ravenclaw doesn't mean they're not smart and etc. Thank you so much for a great review! I'm sorry I didn't reply before :)
That's good. You portrayed Hannah very well. She and Harry don't need to worry, as long as the horcruxes are gone, they will defeat voldemort.
Author's Response: Thank you so much!
This is your promised review (1 of 2).
I do have one nit-picky thing to point out:
Although everyone but me is asleep I can feel the tension in the air
There should be a comma after 'asleep'.
Now, for the real review.
I enjoyed this quite a bit. There was a wonderful feeling of calm mixed with just a bit of tension - only someone who is tense but trying to convince themselves that they aren't would bother to polish their earrings, after all.
I also enjoyed the way you portrayed Harry's reactions to Hannah's words. It's very true that everyone thinks of Hufflepuffs (except perhaps Cedric) as a bunch of duffers, so having one display such wisdom must surely have shocked Harry.
This is quite a moving piece, and I'm very surprised at the truly heart-felt emotion to it. This was absolutely incredible.
And, I'm done gushing now.
Author's Response: Thank you, thank you, thank you! What a lovely review! As for the comma, I didn't catch that, oops! Thanks so much for the review! :D
I rather enjoyed it! I always like fictions that get inside the minds of minor characters such as Hannh Abbot. Great job, and good luck with the challenge!
Author's Response: Thanks! I like minor character fictions too. Thank you so much for reviewing. It really makes my day :)
An excellent story! I have seen very few fics featuring Hannah before. I really like the fact that you view her as an optimist. You can grasp emotions very well and are one of those writers who can actually make a reader feel the story.However a little problem with characterisation in my opinion. Harry is not the type (as potrayed in books) to as such worry about anything. He goes and straight away does his thing. Other than that minuscule fact, everything else was absolutely lovely good show! (hope you win) wendelin the wierd aka thorn
Author's Response: Thanks for that lovely review. I'm truly flattered. As for Harry, I did hesitate a bit at making him the "worried and depressed" that was needed, but I went ahead with it. Thamks so much for reviewing!