Wow, Jenna, this was such an emotionally powerful one-shot! I felt like I was gaining a real understanding of Lavender’s past, and the pain she experienced watching her mother being abused by her dad. This line, She let out a sigh and tried to focus her thoughts on how incredibly happy she was. right at the beginning, really set the tone for the story as it hinted towards the fact that in spite of it being her wedding day, there was something holding her back from being ‘incredibly happy’, and I like that, unusually, her nerves are not cause because of doubts about the man she is about to marry but because of pain cause to her by another important man in her life.
The structure, with the flashback abuse scenes inserted alternatively with the present day wedding scene, was very effective, as it showed the reader exactly what Lavender was going through and helped them to see where her nerves and pain came from. The characterisation was excellent and I think that Lavender’s anger after her initial upset is very in character and shows her strength and fierce determination to protect her mother from harm, and will go so far as to use her magic to ensure he can never hurt them again.
I think the setting of the wedding was absolutely perfect as it’s one of those occasions when the father has such an important traditional role. I can imagine that no matter the pain he caused to her and her mother, and even though she never wanted to see him again, Lavender would have moments of pining for the her dad on that day. However, I really liked that you made the distinction between wanting her dad to be there and just wanting a dad to be there. Having never had the traditional father-figure, it’s heartbreaking just how much she longs for one on her wedding day.
My initial thought was that it would have been good to have discovered the identity of Lavender’s future husband but on reflection, I realised that it really wasn’t important as this was a story about Lavender’s character and her overcoming her past pain. Yes, the fiancé played an important part in that but I don’t think we needed to know who he was to appreciate how much he helped her, so I think you definitely made the right decision. However, I am curious as to whether you wrote this with a specific character in mind for him (though I’m not asking you to tell me!) or whether you haven’t got a clue either?
The ending was wonderful and I thought it was great how not only her mother, but also her future parents-in-law came to her side when she was upset. It showed how much love and support she had from the people around her and was very touching. Obviously, only her mother could truly understand the reason for her pain, but her new family were just as prepared to be there for her, including her fiancé who was the right man for her in all the ways her father was not. This second to last little paragraph: Lavender had never been so happy in her life. She was ready to put the past behind her. She was ready to start a life. She was ready to have a little girl, and watch her grow up with a good man, a good father. Everything was going to be fine, now. After so long, she’d finally found him. really summed up the journey she’d come and showed that she was able to let go of the past and look forward positively to the future.
This was written impeccably, and I particularly liked the use of description here: The chapel was filled with the sounds of last-minute preparations; the small orchestra testing their strings, the flipping pages of the Vow Book as the Bonder went over the incantations and spellwork, the cough of the tailor as he fixed that groom’s pesky trouser leg that somehow ended up three inches shorter than intended. and think the attention to detail is great, as well as being another useful technique in the characterisation, showing us Lavender’s pre-wedding nerves through the fact that she can hear every small sound and movement. The first abuse scene is, in my opinion, the most effectively written and my heart ached for Lavender and her mother when reading it.
I loved this story and am so happy I came across it on your author page. I haven’t read many Lavender fics, but you certainly do her justice!
Wow this was really awesome.. I kindof thought Lavender of having a sucky childhood and tried to make up for not being loved with her and Ron's effed up relationship. Also I loved how you didn't say who the right man was bc that wouldve totally ruined it!!!! Added it to favs!!
Author's Response: Thanks! And I'm glad you liked that I didn't say who it was. A lot of people were upset and kept asking who it was. And I'm just like 'that's not the point. It's about Lavender!' So you. *hugs* to you.
I cried. And from the whole pants leg thing, I'm gonna go out on a limb and say her man is Ron. That was really good.
That was so good, Jenna! What a beautiful story! Well done, 10/10! Abbi :)
who is this man???? i always like to think that Seamus and Lavender hook up.
Poor Lavender! All the emotion you put through in this is amazing, it made me want to be angry when Lavender was and cry when she did. And all the people walking her down the aisle was just an incredibly...touching, I guess, moment. I kinda liked how you never said who she was getting married to, it just sort of proved that that wasn't the point of the story.
Anyway, it's really good.
aww that was sweet =)
That was spectacular! Who is her right man, though?
Wow, that is very powerful. The Song also fits very well. Great Job.
This is fantastic!
I actually like Lavender, which is a big deal.