Reviews For Spontaneity
Reviewer: MysticalMayhem
Date: 08/31/08 16:25
Chapter: Your Heart and Mind.

wow..second person? that's rare. It was really good, I enjoyed it. You got inside Gellert's head brilliantly, it was very realistic. Great job :D

Author's Response: Why, thank you so much!

Reviewer: xxgeorge-charmingxx
Date: 08/16/08 16:25
Chapter: Your Heart and Mind.

wowza. I love it!!! i can really imagine it happening just like this!!! well done!!!

Author's Response: Thank you!

Reviewer: Pendraegona
Date: 08/11/08 15:35
Chapter: Your Heart and Mind.

I don't know what inspired you to do this in second person, but in writing it so you got into Grindelwald's head more easily than you could have managed in any other POV. There was a sharpness and a drive to his thoughts. It wasn't perhaps quite dark enough, and I figured Dumbledore's infatuation was unrequited, but it was still unique and well-done. Good story.

Cheers!

Author's Response: Thank you!!

Reviewer: Mistletoe
Date: 08/11/08 12:41
Chapter: Your Heart and Mind.

Wow! First of all, I can never resist a story written in second person, and I can also never resist a soft slash fic, so I simply couldn’t stay away. I am happy that I didn’t too; you have such a way with these two characters!

I love this part. It characterizes Gellert so beautifully. I have been searching thourgh the words to find the ones that I think best fit him, since they all did so well, and it came down to these.

One thing that you’ve always liked about Albus is how seriously he takes you. All of your ideas are considered and appropriate responses are always made. You’ve never found anyone else like him with such raw intelligence. It’s a pity, you think, that it’s wasted on caring for his brother and sister. You could do such great things together.

The way you show his want of power and control is amazing. How he thinks Albus endearing and is jealous of the resources he has if very Gellert. I’ve never read an Albus/Gellert fic, but I am a big fan of slash (particularly Sirius/Remus and Draco/Blaise). You do a wonderful job of hinting that the relationship is not simply one sided as JKR seemed to say. The relationship you have between them is just what it should be—a relationship based on ideas and brilliance. They are attracted to each other’s ideas of power as two brilliant people would be.

The following part is just beautiful. Your wording is flawless and the images and emotions you create are perfect

It is a brief kiss, a gentle kiss, and when it ends, you open your eyes. Albus looks more relaxed, but he is looking at you with uncertainty in his blue eyes.

For the first time in your active memory, you can’t think of anything to say. The silence has fallen again. It’s a pregnant silence, just waiting for something to happen. So, you do something. You stand quickly and walk back home. There’s nothing else you can do.


I love how at the end you have Gellert arguing with himself over his true emotions and this and that. It seems to be the logical reaction. You really have a way with finding the logical reaction to these situations and making them fit perfectly with the characters.

I have one nitpick:
You envy (quietly – you’d never let it show) his mind and his mental faculties.

Do you mean facilities

And GAH! The ending was so, so perfect.

“Albus,” you drawl. “This is for the greater good.”

I love it! It makes the story, really. Endings can be very weak or very perfect, really, and yours is perfect! Awesome job! I have a feeling I’m going to go in search of some more Albus/Gellert stories now :]

Author's Response: *cough* Should you wish to take a look at another Albus/Gellert fic, may I recommend my own "All He Knew"? The SBBC just finished discussing it last month. Thank you so much for the review. I'm very pleased that you enjoyed it.

Reviewer: lostinside1
Date: 08/11/08 11:20
Chapter: Your Heart and Mind.

:)

this is really good but a shy Albus?? lol. I like it!

Author's Response: I'm glad you enjoyed it.

You must login (register) to review.
Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
Makers of Fine Wands by CanisMajor 1st-2nd Years
Ollivander of Croton arrives in Athens in 382 BC with big dreams, noneof which...
James and Me by Northumbrian 6th-7th Years
Annabel is having a bad day. Her sudden and unexpected meeting with a face from...
Tom Riddle and the Cave of Living Waters by alittletiefling 6th-7th Years
What would happen if Tom Marvolo Riddle had been adopted by well-meaning squibs?...
FEATURED
It Takes Two to Tango by lucca4 3rd-5th Years
They cannot keep doing this; it is only a matter of whose resolve will break...
In The Heat Of The Morning by welshdevondragon 3rd-5th Years
Summary: In the heat of the morning, Katie and Leanne lie in the grounds...
Can't Fight the Moonlight by Acacia Carter 6th-7th Years
A life-changing disaster at work drives Neville Longbottom to seek aid from...
The History Teacher by iLuna17 6th-7th Years
Maybe he didn’t just love history, maybe he loved being a history teacher.
white on white by Padfoot11333 6th-7th Years
Three vignettes about scars, love, and sex.
CATEGORIES