MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!
(Signed) · Date:
01/30/11 14:15 · For:
Aww!! I love this story!! Please write more Bill and Fleur cuz you usally don't find very many stories about them!!!! ~~~CountryCutie112
Author's Response: Yeah, this story was written for a class challange, and I am pleased with how well it has been liked.
(Signed) · Date:
07/17/09 1:25 · For:
This was a wonderful story!
Author's Response: ThanX!
(Signed) · Date:
06/01/09 6:22 · For:
The first thing that struck about your story is your descriptions. You have used imagery beautifully in your story. You have used words beautifully to describe the surroundings, and in turn showed Fleur’s state. This has been evident form the first paragraph itself. The fact that the room had been coloured blue recently was something Fleur was not used to. Nor was she used to having to take care of three children.
I really liked the way you described the three children. It was really smart of you to add veela and werewolf characteristics in the story. Also, I like how Victoire and Dominique being girls have veela characteristics and are thus of a fiery nature. But as Louis is a boy, he lacks that character. He seems to be much more calm and patient just like Bill. However this made me wonder what male Veelas are like.
If any of her old classmates from Beauxbatons walked into the room and saw her now, she was sure they wouldn't believe the woman there was the Fleur Delacour... Even her own mother hadn't been as much of the dedicated caretaker that Fleur had moulded herself into.
When I read that paragraph, all i could think of was that this is what being a Weasley mother does to you. Besides her girls having the fiery veela nature, her children are Weasleys. I think they are known for red hair, lots of freckles and being the most stubborn! And there are also the pranks that they would play. Actually I was feeling really sorry for Fleur after i read your story. It was sad to see Fleur without her fiery streak, though we saw a glimpse of it when she argued with Bill. This was so because I cannot imagine any other state that Fleur would be in after having three children. We have seen enough examples in the books to know that she was caring and maternal. Her behaviour towards her sister is one such example. Also, even she didn’t want to give away her life taking care of her children, there would be enough pressure from the Weasley family that would prevent her from doing so.
“My friend, Reggie, his mummy and daddy don’t live together anymore, and he says that when parents fight all the time, one of them leaves. And then I had a dream that both of you left and the babies were crying, but I couldn’t reach them in their cribs and no one was here to help me…”
This sentence not only showed the Victoire’s concerns for her parents’ marriage, but also her siblings. This really touched me as it reminded of how I behaved with my younger cousins. Elder sisters can be really protective and although Victoire constantly fights with Dominique, I am sure she still loves her dearly. She is a Weasley after all!
I think you have a great grasp for Fleur’s character. She was not entirely stubborn and arrogant or totally happy not doing anything but raising kids. I would definitely suggest your story to someone who is looking for help on Fleur’s character. You have done a really good job. :)
Author's Response: Wow! Such a lovely review! What on earth did I do to deserve this? At any rate, I love it!
mzap (Anonymous) · Date:
04/19/09 23:37 · For:
Oh, this was beautiful! I absolutely loved it! I think you wrote Fleur very well with her not imagining her life the way it ended up. Who knew that Victoire and Dominique would be such trouble. I liked the idea of Fleur being somewhat unnerved by the idea of being such a young mother and tending to all these children, when she imagined her life different before. I also liked the input of how Bill's life also changed drastically. The end was also well done and exactly what I would imagine the children to be like. Overall, I think you did a great job, with beautiful writing and characterization, and I positively loved it.
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I hope you'll read more.
(Signed) · Date:
04/19/09 22:07 · For:
What a sweet story! I think that you did a wonderful job at writing Fleur and the roller coaster ride that results after a baby is born. Victoire's dream putting it all in perspective was also great. There is nothing like the problems and worries of small children to bring adults back to reality. I love how you have personified the children too. You really seemed to catch realistic attitudes and problems in a young family. Thanks for a great story! Cyns
Author's Response: Yes, I have grown to love this portrayl of Fleur as well. In the book, I never felt there were any clues given as to what kind of mother she would be, but I do imagine her as being overwhelmed, at least at first. And Bill, most likely having gone through this twice before, had practise with dealing with it. Poor man!
(Signed) · Date:
03/28/09 15:12 · For:
I really enjoyed this look at Fleur - I’d never considered how mothering three children - or indeed, just one - might affect her. Seeing the protective, maternal streak in her was good, and something I believed in too. It reminded me of her with her little sister, somewhat. Not to mention when the trio arrived at Shell Cottage.
Also, I admire how you slipped the things about the veela and werewolf traits into the story. The jealous Victoire made me laugh, because it does happen among children but having an angry veela child? Slightly different, eh? And the staying up late on full moon for Bill was an idea I haven’t heard before, but one I find very plausible.
Yeah. I liked it. I have a couple of nit-picks:
Though Bill's side-effects from his lycanthropy were limited, his ability to stay up all through the night on the full moon. - do you mean ‘he had the ability to’?
Victoire pouted at this, but still allowed her mother to tuck her back in under her quilt and she eventually settled into the blankets while Fleur made to way across the room to calm the still excited Dominique. - ‘made her/the way’.
Good work. xx
Author's Response: I'm glad you like the story. I'm considering doing more oneshots like this one now, namely because I already have several unfinished chapter fic. I hope you read more!