This looks really good, I can't wait to read the story when it's finished!
Author's Response: Thanks! It won't be too long before it's finished :)
This is such a cool story. Seriously. On MNFF, I've only been hooked on a few as much as your one. I'm kind of sad that it will only be another four chapters long, but that's OK. Life goes on.
Anyway, besides that, I think Marlie sounds ever so slightly suspicious by not saying Jilly's name - but she's still one of the good girls, and Grace is definitely not a baddy either. I feel sorry for her in a way.
I also loved the way James just left Lily alone when he heard her crying (at least the guy's sensitive). I think nowadays, everyone thinks that girls need a shoulder to cry on, and that's not true. Lily's one of those girls who probably doesn't want anyone to see her cry, because that's just embarrassing.
Finally, I hope you post the next chapter soon. I can't wait!
P.S. I just looked at the lyrics of the song you were referring to in your A/N, and I just clocked on that the lyrics are the names of the chapters! God, I'm so stupid sometimes!
Author's Response: I'm glad you like it so much! I'm a little sad it's almost over, too, but I guess I'll just have to start another multi-chapter Lily/James after :) And I feel a little bad for Grace, too. I'm glad you liked how James left Lily be -- that's certainly what I would want someone to do if I were in Lily's position. Thanks for the review! The next chapter should be up soon.
Keep them coming!
Author's Response: :)
Aw man, I caught up. :( Can't wait for the next chapter!
Author's Response: Don't worry, the next chapter should be up within the next few days! :)
I just read this whole story so far straight through and it's wonderful! I like the mix of serious angst and fluffy marauder goodness. Great characterization, and I can't wait for the rest!!
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm glad you like the characterization and think it a good mix of angst and fluff :) The next chapter should be up soon!
Hello! I'm Lydia, and I must confess, I love this story. I'm quite picky with what I read and I have to say, your summary is really what pulled me in and made me read this. It's just about perfectly written, I think, with that right balance of information, without giving away anything too important and still managing to be intriguing.
First off, I'd like to say that I love the fact that this is written solely from James' perspective. This is the first (well-written) fic I've seen from James' POV, that actually does justice his character. So often you see him stereotyped because of what we see in that tiny snippet in book 5, and I really hate that. I mean, there's a reason Lily fell in love with him. (Sorry - passionate about Marauder Era :D) You've got him as this perfect mix of teenage boy (some of his thoughts are hilarious) and young man who is being forced to grow up a little quicker than he might have done otherwise. What I'm getting at is that I love your characterisation. I can see you put lots of thought into your representation of characters, which brings me to Sirius. I love him in this story, and he's my favourite character ever, so it pains me when he's done badly. But your Sirius is funny and the right mix of interested in girls, without chasing anything with a pulse, which makes me cringe when done in fanfic.
Your other characters are great as well. You've really bought something unique to each character, while still making them seem real and relateable, so well done :)
Next, your writing in general. It's fantastic! Seriously, the way you foreshadow and move the plot along nicely, without it feeling rushed or lagging at all is wonderful. This story has a delicious dark edge to it, a sort of ever-lingering sense of foreboding that I love, because it's not a romance for the sake of romance, it's got a real plot, and that constant dark tone reminds us of the other things that are going on, even while we're rooting for James.
And lastly, you've kept me guessing, which is awesome! I can't wait to find out who Jilly's murderer is, and though I have a hunch, you dropped so many little clues and red herrings that we can't be entirely sure. You could write original crime novels - you have that knack for mystery.
So yeah, love the story, love your writing and can't wait for what happens next :)
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I've had a lot of writing this whole story in James's POV and trying to get into his head, so I'm glad you're enjoying it and that you like his characterization and that of other characters -- that's always a key part to fanfiction. This story definitely has a darkness to it that I never fully developed in any of my other stories despite what angst they might have (imo, at least), and it's so good to know that you think it well done and that you enjoy it. And I'm glad you like the mystery! :) The next chapter shouldn't be too far off (hopefully!) Oh, and I'm glad the summary drew you in -- that's always a tricky thing to write.
The drama! The suspence! The wittyly funny Sirius!! ahaha This by far is the cutest chapter in this story, I love how James acts like a real boy in this with the whole i kind of love you stuff it was intirely refreshing and so relateable! Mh i wonder whereRemus is that should be an interesting tidbit of information! Can't wait for more since your single handedly saving me from my project right now!
Author's Response: Thanks very much! I'm glad you liked this chapter! As much as James clearly loves Lily, I still think he'd be what all teenage boys are when it comes to love: ten kinds of awkward :) The next chapter is about half written! Hopefully it'll be posted soon.
ohh such fluff..
This was a great chapter! i loved the bit with the sweater, i imediatly thought it was jillys and that the murderer had planted it there. Am i close? I hope so! please update soon!
Author's Response: There certainly was a lot of fluff! I'm glad you liked this chapter in spite of/because of all the fluff, and you enjoyed the twist with the sweater. As for how close your guess is, you'll have to wait and see ;) Thanks for the review!
LOL..."I kind of love you too" was definitely my favourite line. It was a good thing that you didn't cut it off at the "bloody cardigan" bit - I hate cliffhangers. Besides which, I do think that the cardigan is Jilly's because the girls can get into the boys' dorms, so any of them could easily have put the cardy there. Update soon, please...
Author's Response: I had a lot of fun writing that -- I'm glad you liked it :) And that definitely would have been an awful cliffhanger -- I'm way to attached to them. Thanks for the review!
Well thank got you didn't get to use that evil cliffhanger :P
brilliant chapter possibly my favourite so far. I loved the romance at the beginning of this chapter and i'm so happy they kind of said i love you finally!
and the humour with sirius was nice too :)
and the sweater...definitly suspicious and i think that it was Jilly's.
i cant wait for the next chapter :P
Author's Response: That almost would have been too evil, wouldn't it have been? I'm glad you liked this chapter and the romance. And there will definitely be a LOT more on the sweater ;) Thanks for the review.
Another good chapter - I can't believe Lily and James said 'I love you'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Made my day....and my theory, by the way, was that the person who killed Jilly took her cardigan and placed it in the Marauders room to frame them. Next chapter asap please!!!! :)
Author's Response: Thanks! I really liked writing this chapter, so I'm glad you liked it and enjoyed the exchange of I love you :) And hopefully you'll find out about your theory soon . . .
There are some GREAT Sirius moments in this chapter- all the things he says in their dorm, and just his attitude is HILARIOUS. Remus and peter surprised me to, because they are really funny characters in this. I loved this chapter, and it was a great cliffhanger (:
Author's Response: Thanks! I like to think Sirius would be a pretty hilarious character :) And I know that everybody has different ideas of how Remus and Peter were in school, but I imagine they would be funny and laid back -- there was a reason James and Sirius were friends with them, after all! I'm glad you like how I've written them and like the chapter!
This by far was the funniest chapter (: The banter between the Marauders was hilarious- you got the characterization perfect! I love Lily's character, her and James get portayed so well in all your stories. James is too funny (: I honestly couldnt stop laughing- and I knew it was Polyjuice potion right from the start ;D
Author's Response: Thanks! I never feel very comfortable writing humour, so I'm always relieved that you think it funny and in-character! :)
i luv this story and i luv this chapter!
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad on both counts :)
I've spent about two weeks reading this when I can in my spare time, and boy has it been worth it! I like how Lily already knew that Remus was a werewolf - I'm not surprised really, I always thought that she would know. This story seems just as good as Someone to watch over me. Can't wait for the next update!
By the way, is it still going to be 20-22 chapters, or longer?
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm glad you like it just as much as Someone To Watch Over Me :) And, yes, it does just seem right that Lily already knew Remus was a werewolf. ;) The next chapter should be up soon! And yes, it looks if, at this point anyway, it's still going to be 20 to 22 chapters long (probably 22, MAYBE 23).
really really really love this story!!!!
how dare snape says such things???
i hate him so much....
but I LOVE the james-lily love story and it was really unexpected that she finallh gave in and promised him the may do something more...
please update soon!!!!!!
ohh i like it from james POV so leave it that way!!!!
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you're enjoying and that you like it from James's POV -- I'm pretty sure it'll stay that way. Snape was pretty awful in this chapter, but his part to play in the story isn't over yet. . . . The next chapter should be up soon!
Wow this story like made my day! Like usual I love how the characters are so perfectly written, James is written so perfectly, and I love how instead of just falling in love with Lily you put in the exact moment when James realized it I think that it was soo cute. I can't wait to read the next chapter!!
Author's Response: Thanks very much! I'm so glad you think the characters remain well written. And if you like the romance in this chapter, I think you're going to love the next one! ;)
well, from this point of view... id say snapes screwed himself over with that comment.
Author's Response: Yep, pretty much. But he has a role yet to play ;)
More, more, MORE PLEASE!!!
I really liked this chapter, but poor Lily.. H
her lovely dance in memory of Jilly was ruined.
I think this story is great when it's written from James POV. It's interesting to read his thoughts and feelings because people tend to right about Lily more. But, perhaps, you could write a one-shot from LIly's POV, showing how she felt..
Haha.. and I loved Remus' comments.. 'He can spell his own name' and 'I don't understand why people think they are really, really good friends!'
Going back for another read,
Little Miss Witch x
Author's Response: Thank you so much! Poor Lily, indeed -- but the next chapter goes pretty well for her ;) I'm glad you like it in James's POV and you enjoyed all of what Remus had to say. Remus is a lot of fun to write, I think.
Love love love this story. You're incredibly talented. You write Sirius so perfectly as well as James, Lily and Remus :] read the whole story in one sitting. It's that addicting. Can't wait for more.
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm glad you think I write Sirius and Remus well in addition to James and Lily -- I'm always nervous about characterizations :) And the next chapter should be up soon!