Banners do work. I saw yours and clicked :D.
Not sure how I ever missed this, Julia, possibly the AU tag - hahah. BUT IT'S GINNY/DEAN and that is win! Except your version isn;t and it's all very sad
This is a very plausible set up, actually, and you wrote this so beautifully. I loved the repetition of the word Greek. The double play here of Greek to mean something incomprehensible here, and Greek because they were in Greece, works very well with the mysterious atmosphere of the story. I loved the end, the feeling that we never quite know what is happening to Ginny and whether she has stepped through.
Well done ~Carole~
Author's Response: Thank you, Carole! I am glad I decide to trawl through my old photobucket folders :) This fic was actually written for the first SBBC Mix and Match Activity so it's a nice surprise to receive a review for it now after all this time. The couple I was emulating were The Doctor and Rose. I liked the parallel between their separation and the veil. In the original drabble it was Spain and not Greece but when expanding it into a one-shot I thought Spain was far too close to Voldemort for comfort and moved them to Greece. Greece seems much more fitting, I think. The romanticism it can often conjure within us because of it's ancient history and mythology is a nice contrast to the horror and fear Ginny is feeling, and her out-of-placeness. At the same time the themes in Harry Potter often draw from Greek mythology. Thank you so much for this review, Carole. It was a lovely surprise and brought a smile to my face :D Julia xoxo
This is so sad.
Author's Response: Thanks for the review! It was very sad to write.
This is beautifully sad. I love the way it's written, balanced between what Ginny thought at the time, things now, and wishes to have happened instead. The line that particularly struck me was "Those thoughts of adventure, those thoughts of epic duels and fighting to the death were a distorted photographic negative that had never been developed."
I just think that's a beautiful image of something that was meant to happen but never did. And the ending. The ending was so sad and beautiful. Anyway if you can make sense of that rambling review than basically I enjoyed it very much!
Author's Response: Hi, Alex! This is very much a bittersweet AU fic so I'm glad that came through. Thanks so much much for the read and review :) I'm glad you enjoyed it! ~Julia.
I remember this from its original state. In that one, weren't they in Spain? I would be curious to know the reason behind the change, unless I'm being barmy and it was Greece all along.
I love how you use colour to add life and substance to a fic. It's like your keys are paints and your fingers are the brush, casting their vivid slashes across the page to spin a story worth knowing. One thing is for certain, and it is that you got your thousand words' worth out of this picture. The emotions in it are simply stunning.
Well done, you. :D
Author's Response: Okay, I just noticed your reviews! I'm still getting no automatic notifications from MNFF so I wasn't ignoring you! Anyway, yes, originally in the SBBC drabble they were in Spain but when I was doing the re-write I changed it to Greece. The point for them being in another country was to hide from Voldemort's forces in Britain. Spain just seemed far too close for that. Greece is a lot further away and so it suited my reasoning for the setting much better. Thank you so much for the lovely review, Jess!
I strolled in here planning to review something else. Really, I could not remember if I had reviewed it, and I still haven’t found it. We’ll hold that one out for later, I love the idea of Harry slipping in behind the veil. Interestingly, and I don’t know whether this occurred to JKR, but it seems too close to be a coincidence. But this is Percy Shelley’s idea of Death extending beyond that painted veil. This seems as though it really could have been a take, you know? Harry spilling in? I would want to, especially if I’d just lost my one person.
Greek, indeed. Think on that. How would that feel it be ripped from your family and left with two people? Yes, she knew Dean, for she dated him for a short period, but can you imagine this chaos? Maybe you need a deeper explanation there, maybe not, because the surface area covers it a bit, but I find myself wanting a bit more of an explanation. It makes sense the way you have it written, of course. Oh, you’re playing with the Greek thing, twisting it back and forth? Honestly, I don’t know that you’re doing any of that, but I like it. You usually write like that and I peel back these layers, so I might want it to be there.
She’s drunk and still thinking on it. That makes since on so many levels. Just because people die and move on, they still think about people, especially as young as Ginny, and the way you pictured her. How can she not be like this? Why would she not be comfortable stuck in the past? With everything painted in this Greek image, it’s al very artificial, and that is such an effect, Julia, because she wants nothing to be real. It’s written in a rather confusing way. In truth, that would usually annoy the hell out of me, butte wants to be in that cloudy limbo.
Interesting. I like the insight into the character. Well done.
Thanks for the review. I love that you mentioned Shelley's poem - I've never really thought about that in terms of the veil in the Ministry but now that you mention it... it seems so fitting, and as you say, too close to be a coincidence.
"Lift not the painted veil which those who live Call Life: though unreal shapes be pictured there, And it but mimic all we would believe With colours idly spread,—behind, lurk Fear And Hope, twin Destinies; who ever weave Their shadows, o’er the chasm, sightless and drear. "
Wow, it really does seem fitting. Gosh, how I would love to ask JKR about that now! The veil has always fascinated me and I've often thought about how I personally would react to it. I just know the temptation to walk through would be so great - to see the one's I've loved and lost again, perhaps, if that's what happens when you pass through - and I sort of projected that feeling onto Ginny. I did try to keep it in her character, though.
I guess the reason I didn't go into the back story of Ginny and Dean escaping to the continent was because of how I wanted to structure the fic. I didn't feel like it added to what I wanted to write so I didn't go into a more detailed explanation. I don't know what it's like to lose everyone I love and be left with only two people, but I do know what it's like to lose a parent and to nearly lose another so I worked from that experience. I always imagine that Ginny was someone comfortable around people and to have almost everyone ripped from her like that would be unbearable. Perhaps she latched onto all that was familiar left to her and that was Dean?
I imagine her drinking and her memories are something of a luxury for her. She can completely lose herself in the past and try to imagine a different future for herself - a future with everyone she has lost, reunited once again. I like how you mentioned the Greek reality to seem artificial. I wanted to make her 'real' world to seem less real than her memories and her imagination. Walking through the veil seems more real to her than this reality that she never expected and never, ever wanted.
I hope it wasn't too confusing. It was an extended drabble which is why it is rather short but as soon as I started adding more into the story I felt it took away from what I wanted to portray, if you know what I mean?
Again, thanks for the thoughtful review!
Oh my goodness, Julia. That left me nearly breathless and sad. I actually took a moment to stare at my computer after I read that. I love reading your stories because you are such a powerful writer. The mix of incredible beautiful language mixed with the way you piece them together nearly like poetry…but just in the right way so as not to overwhelm. It still flows like prose. But the imagery is astounding. She stepped up towards the arch. Pain shot through her leg, and vomit rose up her throat, hot and sour, deathly sweet. Vomit described as deathly sweet? But because of the context, it makes sense…or at least, it does to me, because of the sense of what you are trying to convey.
I think the strength in this lies in two things:
First, in the way in which it flows between thoughts. This is not strictly a stream of consciousness, but it moves between all of Ginny’s thoughts that she seems to have every night. And you connect all of these ideas that bind all of these thoughts together at the end of each paragraph or each phrase:
"She was angry now. Her sorrow always seemed to slowly slip into anger—anger at Harry. He had been so selfish."
"Merlin, it hurt so much. And yet how could she be angry with him when here she was, twenty years old, drunk, and still thinking about the boy she had never known to love?"
I love the way that you have Ginny move between all of the emotions, because you managed to have me moving right along with her. Even though it might not make rational sense if you stop and think about it (but really, when do emotions make rational sense?), when I was reading along with her, everything she was feeling made sense to me…if that makes sense…lol. The sorrow moving to anger because it makes her think of the selfishness…and the anger melting into the sadness and pity because she realizes she’ll never get to be with him…it’s such a depressing story when you think about it, because I got the impression reading this that it was something that Ginny experienced every night.
As they had never dated, I thought that Ginny’s attachment to Harry was overdone…or at least, would have been at the hands of a lesser writer. I’ve said dozens of times, and I’ll continue to say, that any cliché can be subverted, or even fully embraced, as long as it’s well written. Here is a great example of the love-struck Ginny that never even got to date Harry, and yet here she pines after him, which really shouldn’t make any sense, but it works. I honestly don’t know how realistic her love for him would have been, If we’re going to talk in a canoninical sense (LOL I really wanted to use that word, which I think I just made up, but you know what I meant?) …but because of the brilliance with which you wrote this, and the emotion that you carried through, I think it worked. I was going to suggest that perhaps it could have worked (if you wanted to be canon-compliant) by emphasizing more that his death really screwed things up for her family and caused everything to fall apart rather than making it about GINNY AND HARRY, but some of the lines were so freaking good, and poignant, and sad ("She wanted to think he had thought of her, of all their possibilities. But that was a teenage dream, a teenage crush, a teenage hope that had been lost at the age of fifteen, sixteen or seventeen. She did not know." AND the one I quoted already, about the “boy she had never known to love”) that I really don’t mean that completely whole-heartedly. But, you also know I’m a big sap for H/G, too. :)
Anyway, the second thing that makes this so powerful, and something I’ve noticed in some of your other writing, is that you have an awesome ability to use repetition. AND: your ability to use it without it becoming overpowering. The most obvious one is the use of “Greek”, which has a double meaning. I actually thought at first you meant Greek simply as “foreign”, but then when I realized you really did mean “Greek”, as in, they were in Greece, I realized you were a little genius. Also, the repetition of Ginny’s memories interspersed with what was happening in real time helped us not only to figure out what was going on (although, that didn’t take much in a sense of the core “Harry went through the veil” part), but really, to understand why it would have affected her so deeply. And mainly, it was the way they were written that stood out for me. There wasn’t really a sense of coherence to them (umm, that’s supposed to be a compliment)…it was almost raw feeling and movement, and the style of the flashbacks was much different than the rest of the piece, but it helped give a sense of loss and emptiness to what she was presently feeling.
You actually write similar in some ways to Natalie (and GAH you are both brilliant at it) in sentences like:
"those possibilities, those dreams of an eleven-year old girl had been cut from existence."
"There was a crash behind her, a strangled cry."
"So hard, so broken."
"But that was a teenage dream, a teenage crush, a teenage hope that had been lost at the age of fifteen, sixteen or seventeen."
Where, you don’t use conjunctions, but rather phrases strung together, but the places you chose to use them are usually where you want to convey something more emotional. And they weren’t overdone (because using them too much can become annoying and overbearning) and each place it just worked. It’s almost an artistic style of writing, and it looks poetic in a sense. Does that make sense?
I have no idea why I’m giving you a review this late at night…*coughslightlyintoxicated*…but as soon as I read this story I knew I had to, because of the sense of awe I had after reading it. I was kind of surprised it only had 2 reviews. This was quite tragic, but it was very fantastically written, and left me nearly breathless with its imagery and its language. You are a brilliant, brilliant writer, Julia!
PS: I'm SO SO SORRY! But I've tried to leave you this review TWICE now and it keeps cutting it off so I had to go through and remove all of the formatting. :( Sorry! Hopefully it worked this time!
Author's Response: Amanda! I'm finally replying to your wonderful review (I just typed woderful three times. I think there is something wrong with the 'n' on my keyboard O.o). First of all, thank you so much! It was such a surprise to see this since I've only received two other reviews so far. And the length! It made me all warm and fuzzy inside XD
I'm glad you found the emotions flowed well. I really tried hard to make the whole thing cohesive especially since it was an extended drabble. Like you said, it's not quite stream of consciousness but I wanted that feeling so it's good that came across. And you're right, I imagined Ginny doing this every night, like a really sad, tragic tradition. How morbid am I?
The aim of the fic wasn't really supposed to be focused on Ginny's love for Harry. In fact, I didn't really want to imply that Ginny was actually in love with Harry but more that she was grieving for what might have been and the fact that Harry's death changed her life so much. I took a long time to post this because I wasn't sure whether I should put it in the Alt Universe cat or Harry/Ginny. Now I think it may have been better in the Alt Universe cat because in my mind it's not actually a romance fic O.o And canoninical is SO a word no matter what Firefox tells me lol.
Hehe I'm rather happy you mentioned my repetition. I use it quite often and I worry that it gets tired and boring after a while. You also mentioned the 'raw feeling and movement' and I have to say that this is what I was going for. I really wanted this constant feeling that Ginny was on the brink of... I don't want to say a break-down but maybe that's the closest way to describe it. I just had this image of her sitting in a kitchen and a table with this glass of wine and looking as if she was about to slump over and burst out crying. It was almost as if she was using the memory to suppress this. Oh lol. I must sound crazy. I just like getting into characters' heads.
OMGoodness, you compared me to Natalie. Thank you so much. That is a huge compliment since I am in complete awe of her writing. And I can't believe what a lovely review you left me. I'm smiling from ear to ear right now and I just hope this response is adequate enough. No wonder you are in SPEW!
Thank so much! *hugs*
Ah, the veil - what a fascinating subject to write about. I've thrown a few people thru it myself, lol! I like your premise here - that Harry went through after Sirius. It would have certainly changed the outcome of the war. I like how you focused on just one aspect, though - Ginny. She saw it happen and you can clearly feel her lingering pain and anger, almost like post-traumatic stress disorder. Given that she also lost her family, it is no wonder she has moved away and turned to drinking to try and get over it. This strikes me as a scene you saw and felt very clearly, and have written to be very moving for the reader. It was a very possible 'what if?' scenario that was well-written with lots of emotion. I enjoyed reading it even though I felt so sad for Ginny! Nice work! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Hi Gina! Thanks for the lovely review. I've always found the veil incredibly fascinating and I remember thinking that it would play a large role in Deathly Hallows. I'm not disappointed that it didn't, though, because I don't think JKR had to explain everything, and it also leaves a lot of room for us fanfic writers to play with! You're right about thinking about this scene vividly. I wrote the original drabble for the SBBC Couples Activity for the Doctor/Rose pairing. I was thinking about how Rose and the Doctor were eventually separated by the void and it made me think of the veil. What if Harry and Ginny had been separated by the veil before their own relationship could flourish? It is a tragic thought (I ummed and ahhed as to whether to put this fic in the AU, Harry/Ginny or Dark/Angst category) but I felt compelled to explore the idea. Again, thanks so much for the read and review! -Julia XD
Very good! It's hard to imagine Ginny being so bitter, but you wrote it really well! :)
Author's Response: Thank you!