Jenn! -squishes- Aw, thank you for this amazing fic first off, dear :) I really enjoyed it the first time, and I’ve loved the chance to read it again.
You know you get right into Andromeda’s thoughts, which I found confusing at first, but I kind of like it that way, because thoughts shouldn’t be completely cohesive to an outsider, and when you pull her out of them it just goes to go how deep in contemplation she is. It introduces Andromeda’s character and circumstances well, I think, by throwing us right in the deep end.
I don’t know if you realised that you missed off the whole beginning section when this story was published on SPEW’s LJ, but I’m pleased I’ve had the opportunity to read it with the introduction. It adds a whole new dimension to the story, combining the Muggle joy of Trick-or-treat and the scorn with which wizards look at that Muggle tradition. The beginning really sets that spooky, kind of cheesy, Halloween-tone, which compliments the darker elements of the story that come later quite nicely. The two tones -- spooky and creepy -- balance each other out rather well.
I love you characterisation of Dora. She’s so determined not to go to bed, and Andromeda dismisses this because it’s such a regularity. But then Dora mentions the vampire, and since this is a Halloween story that’s where I started to feel uneasy -- even though Andromeda doesn’t see any ‘vampire’ at this point, the whole scenario plants that creeping feeling that there’s something out there, waiting for them in the night. It sets a great mood for the rest of the story.
The other person I think you characterised perfectly was Sirius. He comes through the door supporting a bloodied Peter, and he is so matter-of-fact about it all, almost unbothered by the situation, that it makes me want to laugh in a way. It’s such a serious situation, but then again -- maybe Sirius sees this sort of thing so often that it ceases to have such an effect on him. It’s an interesting thought, and kind of scary too.
Again, I have to comment on mood. I think you really excel in creating that perfect creepy mood when Andromeda goes outside. As a reader, who’s all ready feeling uneasy from the vampire and Sirius’ arrival, I’m thinking going outside, especially on your own in the dark, is a pretty silly thing to do. She even acknowledges that Sirius could’ve been followed. Then you mention the dogs not barking, and she comes across this obviously dead body. Every thing culminates to produce a seriously creepy tone that had me on the edge of my seat. You’ve done a great job with that aspect.
Overall, I have to say my favourite thing about this story is the way you have the spooky Halloween atmosphere down flawlessly. I really enjoyed this. Thank you again =D xx
Author's Response: Wow, inspirations, I jsut realised that I never responded to this. How rude of me! I am so glad that you liked this. I'd never done anything remotely creepy in my writing, so I'm glad that it somehow got pulled off and you enjoyed it. I tend to stray away from the Marauders in terror, so the fact that you like that floors me. See? I feel really bad about not responding to this now. Three months late. It was a fun write, but the fact that you enjoyed and thought it was creepy makes it a thousand times better for me, Spire. Thank you for the review. - Jenn
I really love stories that focus on the Black sisters, and your idea was really amazing. I really enjoyed this!
Author's Response: Thank you