Reviewer: The_Real_Hermione
Date: 08/17/11 0:45
Chapter: Prologue

I just had to read this fic because I don't think I've ever read a story in which the protagonist shares my name before... anyway.

This is a promising start, particularly considering it's your first attempt at fanfiction. Whilst I personally can't see Bellatrix having children, it does work as an interesting premise for a story.

You've started out with strong characterisation of Katrina - she's clearly determined to be different and independent. She also has remarkable control of her feelings and what she shows to other people for an 11-year-old. This reminded me of a few people - she's a little like how I imagine a young Sirius to be in terms of wanting to be different, but she's fare more scornful of other people (like the line Hogwarts disgusted her – all the kids who did as they were told, who sat where they were ordered to sit...). She also reminded me of a young Tom Riddle, and the way you've constructed her, I wouldn't be surprised if her control of magic was beyond most other kids her age. I also liked how she always called the other students "kids" or "children" in a way which showed that she clearly excludes herself from that group - she's certainly got some 'Black' arrogance.

I think Katrina also has some of her mother's characteristics. Whilst Bellatrix follows the 'Pureblood supremacy' route her family prefers, she does it in an unconventional way. There are only two female Death Eaters in canon - her and Alecto - and Bellatrix seems to be the only one who is in Voldemort 'closer circle'. Anyway, I'm getting a little off topic here...

I think it's interesting that the Sorting Hat doesn't take her choice into consideration - in my opinion, one of JKR's main themes in the series is that "It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities". I wonder - is there a part of Katrina who does want to be in Slytherin, or for whom saving face with her family is more important than she thinks? (Not that I expect you to answer that question... I'm assuming this story will lol).

I found the last paragraph a little bit awkward... particularly the line And shortly she met the gaze of the boy she’d been seeking, the boy of whom she knew that his choice had been considered,.... Perhaps you could say "... the boy whose choice she knew had been considered..." - I think it just flows a bit better. It's also a bit unclear how she actually knows this - does she see it when she makes eye contact with him? Or did she just guess? Also, you've written even though she couldn’t possibly have heard the words of the Sorting Hat. - Your use of the conditional here suggests that even though she shouldn't have been able to, she actually did hear the sorting hat or something to that effect - do you actually mean to say "even though she hadn't heard the words of the Sorting Hat"? I just thought that was a bit unclear.

Anyway, those are just small things. I think this is an intriguing beginning with a strong character at its centre.


Author's Response: Thank you very, very much for this helpful review! And also thank you for reading! I'm sorry to disappoint you, however, by saying that the story of Katrina (which is, by the way, a beautiful name!) is currently on hold, because I started it rather spontaneously and did not think it through much. I started working on something else also because it took so long to be validated, and I did a lot more research on that one. It's called "The Life and Lies of Bellatrix Lestrange" and the first chapter is now waiting as well. Maybe I'll pick up Katrina's story again one day, but for now I'm working on that of Bellatrix. Sorry about that but I hope you'll read Bellatrix' as well! Thank you so much! Yours, Inge-Vera

Reviewer: Fynnsmom
Date: 08/16/11 13:16
Chapter: Prologue

Very good start. I can't wait to see where this story goes. I'm wondering why the Sorting Hat didn't take her choice into account. And, why she's not known to the wizarding world. I hope you update soon and I can't wait to see if you go into descriptions of Katrina's home life. I am working on a story about Bellatrix. I hope you check it out. Great chapter.

Author's Response: Thank you very much for reading and for your positive review! I will definitely look at your story on Bellatrix, too! Although, I am sorry to disappoint you by saying that this story of Katrina is currently on hold, because I started it rather spontaneously and didn't think it through much. Also, because it took so long to be validated, I commenced work on "The Life and Lies of Bellatrix Lestrange" which I have planned out almost completely. I might pick up Katrina's story one time again, but for the moment it's taking a break. So sorry about that! But it would be fun to read both of our stories on Bellatrix, don't you think? Thanks again for reading and everything! Yours, Inge-Vera

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