Happy birthday, Jess! I saw the new chapter up, and couldn’t resist leaving you a birthday review.
Darius is so pitch perfectly evil! Not in a cartoon villain way, thank goodness, but he is just horrible. How can a father possibly criticise his daughter for being “snide” when he has just had her drugged? Then there was the “unfortunate affliction” thing, and then he referred to himself as her “benefactor”. He made me want to shudder, then go and hug Daphne. You have managed to engender a lot of sympathy for a character who started out as a bit of a cow.
I did confuse myself slightly when you first introduced Darius in this chapter, because I had forgotten your earlier mentions of him, and was reading slightly too fast for my own good. The way he kept calling Daphne “dear” and “darling”, and your use of “drawled” made me imagine him sounding quite camp, and not father-like at all. Even when I had figured out exactly who he was and had a good laugh at my idiocy, I kept imagining him as slightly camp. That’s just me and the same crazy brain that brought you Pirate!Michael though, and not a fault with your writing.
I laughed along with Daphne when she described her outfit. She needs to get together with Michael already! She’s already wearing his clothes for goodness’ sake. As in previous chapters, I’m so glad she found the courage to stand up to her father. I was slightly surprised that she lost control to the extent where she yelled at her father, but then I suppose she had been provoked enormously. When she said she wasn’t “some painting to be hung on a wall”, I winced slightly on Michael’s behalf, but then I think she might find herself willing to have a double standard here.
I was so glad to know that Astoria and Iris were on Daphne’s side. The detail about the Muggleborn grandfather was a brilliant way of showing why Iris wasn’t like her husband. I liked seeing that she had used her influence to the exact opposite of her husband’s ends. Even in a patriarchal family, the women can get their own way. The teacup Portkey made me smile; I love little family details like that. Astoria seems so sweet, but thankfully not too innocent.
I hate heights, so I absolutely understood Daphne’s fear while on the window ledge. However, I found the sentence
“She feared looking down and seeing the ground rapidly approaching far more.”
quite awkward to read, and according to MS word, it isn’t a complete sentence. Maybe it would work better if you said “She was far more afraid of…” instead.
And then you left me on another cliff hanger! I cannot wait for the next chapter, and it’s a relief to know that I won’t have to for much longer. Congratulations on the QSQ nomination by the way. Lori beat me to it! One last thing; there is something in my Dean’s Corner thread that might make you giggle, if you have time to look. (Shameless self promotion, I know :P) Happy birthday again!
One thing I've always loved is a good villain. One of the things I've always loved about good villains is the lack of repentance, the fact that they are certain what they're doing is right. A brilliant villain, to me, holds his ground just as a hero does. How boring would Voldemort or Bellatrix have been if they felt bad about the things they were doing? Sure, Snape was considered a villain by many, as were the Malfoys and many of the Slytherin lot, but really, were they? To me, they were antagonists, and antagonists are a world away from being villains. No, I wanted Darius to be a villain in the true respect of the word, because he, even after his daughter disowned him, thought she was in the wrong and not him.
I think it was important for Daphne to know her mother and sister were on her side, though not publicly. I don't know if Daphne would've forgiven herself if she had written off her entire family. After all, even Michael has his old Aunt Effie. They basically gave her the go-ahead to take down Darius because he was a relic of an era that was crumbling as the years passed.
The bit about Daphne wearing Michael's clothes...I had to throw that in. First off, it makes me giggle at the thought of it, and second, I think Daphne was trying on not just a new style of clothing, but the newborn freedom to wear whatever the hell she wanted because there was no one to cluck disapprovingly at her choices. Do I think she's a jeans and man-shirt girl? She might be, but I actively root for her freedom to find out by trial and error. ♥
Heights. Yeah, while I don't fear them specifically, I appreciate the honesty of gravity. It's clear, consistent, deceptive only in the eye of the beholder, and doesn't discriminate. And it was very much something I could attribute to myself when I said that the height didn't bother Daphne so much as the prospect of falling. Speaking of, I might just go back and prod that sentence a little bit. Naturally, it says what I wanted it to say, but that doesn't mean it reads the same across the board. Thanks for pointing that out.
Thank you for the lovely review, the birthday wish, and of course, the adorable drawing. MNFF has been so good to me today, and it reminds me of why I do what I do around here; you all (especially you right now) make it worth it. Squishes and hugs. I look forward to seeing you again!
I seriously cannot stand these chapter endings... waiting is agony, even if it isn't long. This fic continues to deliver, in every way. What a great twist that both her mum and her sister support her to a degree. Considering how terribly things went with her father, I'm sure she needed to know there were still family relationships there that would survive this, somehow. I also really liked how resourceful she was, with the Disillusionment charm and getting out on the ledge, then figuring out to try the bathroom for Apparition... glad you didn't just have Michael come rescue her. ;) (Though that is probably what I would have done--lol.) I think it goes without saying that this is my favorite of all the stories I've read of yours. And its a pairing you have truly sold me on. Well done.
Muahahahaha! I have a mania for cliffhangers, I won't lie. Didn't think this was much of a cliffie, but apparently, both you and Gina vehemently disagree, lol.
I think this chapter was important for Daphne in that she started to question what was left of her old beliefs, namely those regarding her family and the relationships she had always relied on. It's hard to turn your back on the life you've known for ages, burn all those bridges, but seeing what her father really was made the choice a lot clearer for Daphne. Also, I think knowing that Astoria and their mother were capable of fending for themselves heartened her and sent her off with the knowledge that her family was still her family, even if her father was a git-faced sleazoid.
I actually had toyed with the idea of having Michael rescue her, but the idea of him actually getting into the house felt ludicrous. There is a story behind the portkey. Remind me to tell you sometime. :)
Anyway, I'm glad you are enjoying the story so much, and it will be with pride and immense pleasure that I will add 'Nominated for a 2012 Quicksilver Quill Award' to the summary. <3 you, and stay tuned.
I've finally come to read it, and just in time for your birthday! Although, I must admit that was not my initial plan, lol. However, the timing is now perfect. Happy birthday, twin! And congrats on the story that I know gave you some fits over on LS! Really, I don't know why: it doesn't show. But I could see how it probably grew and grew and grew--and that's a good thing.
Well, I love it. First of all, I really like what you've done with Daphne: bit of a rich bitch to start, but still with heart. You've shown her character development well, particularly through the pregnancy and pseudo-relationship with Theo. She's likable, and I'd always assumed Daphne Greengrass wouldn't have been likeable, simply because she was a Slytherin with a Malfoy for an in-law.
Second of all, I like your male characters! I think Theo and Terry were great together, they were always so enjoyable to read. Especially Theo - you have a wonderful character there to explore. He's torn between Terry and Daphne, between one world and another. I loved how he started to resolve it in chapter 7. Good for him. And good for Terry for being so understanding…and,um, free with the clothing, lol.
But I really like Michael! Oh how you pile on the layers! I mean, he came off as gruff from the start and yet it still seemed like there was something there. And then he was so nice to Daphne. Of course she started to fall for him! But that line: You.repluse.me. Niccccccce. ;)
Only then you threw in that twist with him and his bottom drawer, and now another with her and her family, so I can't wait to see how things turn out for them. I'm totally rooting for them but also expecting more twists. And I'm very worried about Daddy Greengrass.
Your research was great, and you fleshed out the Potterverse post-war really well, as usual. The lasting effects on Muggle-borns were chilling.
I loved some of the snarky lines: I could almost hear you saying them, lol.
I think you've got a good balance of plot and character here that was really quite engrossing to read. Like I said, I stayed up quite late reading the first half. I really liked the second half. You're a great writer, and I'm so glad you had a chance to put aside other things and produce such a great story.
I'm looking forward to seeing where Daphne's speech takes her. Was the reporter another nod to a certain BBC series, perhaps? ;)
Happy birthday, twin! Keep on writing!
Oh, Gina, you are truly lovely, just so you never forget!
To be honest, writing this fic didn't make me angst; knowing it was ballooning out of control did. I was enraptured with this whole thing while I was writing it, and I'm so glad I got the chance. I needed this fic, and I think Daphne's story needed to be told, as well. I'm glad we could fulfil that mutual need, hehe.
I feel bad when Slytherins are painted with a certain brush of two-dimensionality. I think everyone, regardless of house, has a story that someone should tell. Maybe that's why a majority of my author page is dedicated to characters that barely saw a paragraph in the books. Daphne was a product of her environment, but she was still the person she became while with Michael, only in need of some stripping down, so to speak.
I find it very hard NOT to ship Theo/Terry now. They need each other so much because they're so different. Theo needed Terry's courage to be who he really was, and Terry needed Theo's support to manage in the times when he couldn't sleep through the nightmares about the Battle or when the memory of Anthony's death hit him a bit too hard. Plus, Theo's buckets of money to spend on clothing for Terry to play with helped, hehe. They just...work.
I'm glad Michael comes across as layered rather than inconsistent, to be honest. I looked long and hard at this story when it was finished and worried about how he would be received a lot. I didn't even know if readers would like him because he was such a jerk at first, but realising that Daphne had broken his heart and not even noticed makes him extraordinarily human and relatable. We were all there as teenagers, with a crush on someone who either doesn't know we exist or particularly care if we do. Treating her like he was already rejecting her from the get-go was his way of both maintaining a safe distance AND a bit of retribution, which to me fit the bill of the boy who we only briefly glimpsed in canon.
The bottom drawer is...complicated. I think Michael took to drawing her because he was so observant of her minute physical details, such as symmetrical features and pleasing proportions. Then I think he started romanticising what she was really like and who she was that he developed an obsession with the Daphne in his head, rather than the real Daphne. And when they were in the same Potions class, he got a whiff of what she was, but he was still enamoured. Poor guy. But meeting her one on one...I think he hated her for not being what he wanted her to be more than anything. It was hard to layer that into the fic. Hopefully, judging by reactions, I succeeded.
To me, Daphne's speech was a mixed bag. I don't even know whether she wholeheartedly agreed with what she was saying or if she was doing it to rile Daddy. I know it was at least partially both, but which took precedence, I don't know. I can hear Michael's words in the description of the displaced Muggle-borns in the details, but when I hear it, I hear Daphne say it. I really shouldn't be admitting this, lol. The reporter was just a reporter, as you've seen in the next chapter, who knew a juicy story when he saw one. There were probably wizard Pulitzers in his eyes when he looked at Daphne.
And as for plot...you know my relationship with plot. It feels kind of dirty not having it, but this fic, in particular, needed to be more than just a romance. The stories that mean the most to me aren't just about whether characters get together or not; it's about whether what's going on is interesting enough for me to come back and find out. I'm glad it has that 'unputdownable' feel, because it's been so long since I was able to write something like that. :)
Anyway, thanks for the gorgeous review, and I'm glad you're enjoying the story. It means a lot to me when I get a good mix of friends and non-f-list people reading a story because it makes it feel, you know...more valid, I guess. <3
Completely hooked!!! Brilliant!
Oh, hello! I haven't seen you in a while. Welcome back!
I'm glad you like it. It was a lot of fun to write, and I hope you like the rest of the story. :)
Hey, Jess, I’m back again. I can’t seem to get this story out of my head. I have grown rather attached to it since my first review, and the frequent updates have been a joy. That cliff hanger was unexpected! I was half expecting any plot twists to come from medical complications. The evil father thing (for that’s who I assume is behind the kidnapping) is so much better though.
Anyway, I wanted to let you know that I absolutely adore Michael. He has so much depth as a character, and I just hope that he can get to love the real Daphne as well as the one he imagined. The comparison with the Phantom is so much more appropriate than he would admit. Is the portrait of the shy girl on the wall meant to be Daphne? It would certainly fit with the contents of his bottom draw. I wonder why Terry never figured it out though, if I’m right.
I had a slightly odd experience when reading your description of Michael dressing up to receive Theo and Terry. The image of a pirate popped into my head. No kidding. I think it’s the eye patch and ponytail combo that did it. When you say vest, do you mean a waistcoat type of thing? I’m not sure if it’s an American usage, or if I’m just confusing myself :/
Daphne’s development has been stage managed perfectly. She seems to be turning into a much nicer person, although as I said before, I could even empathise with her when she was her old selfish self. Although she is changing a lot, it seems natural and understandable. Even Domestic Godess!Daphne seemed perfectly believable, and I envy the easy with which she took to cooking. I’m so glad that she has decided to defy her parents. Theo would make a great husband for her, but it would be totally unfair on him. He is so right about Daphne and Michael. They would (will? Please?) make a great couple, once they have resolved all of their issues. I love Terry and Theo as a couple too.
Terry is such a great character. I wasn’t sure about him at first in chapter 5, even though his rudeness to Daphne was largely justified. But then he said “He wants to hate you” and with one sentence I understood so much. You are really good at finding ways to let the reader understand a character, without telling them stuff straight out or being patronizing. Then in chapter 6, the way Terry looked after Michael endeared him to me even more.
Right, ramble over. I just have one little nitpick, from all the way back in chapter 2. When Michael first mentions that something isn’t right with the pregnancy, you wrote “entopic” where I believe you meant “ectopic”. A quick google revealed that entopic pregnancies are actually perfectly healthy pregnancies, and while I doubt many people know that, it could be confusing for any of your readers who do. Apart from that, I really couldn’t fault this story so far, and I doubt I will be able to with the remaining chapters either. I have so much love for this story!
Yay, you're back! What a lovely review, too! And considering I'm in the business of reviews... <3
I think you hit on all the things I wanted to put out there, such as Michael's somewhat-unreasonable-at-first hostility toward Daphne, as well as Terry's, and Theo's awkwardness around Daphne until he felt comfortable with being himself with her. It's hard to gauge when you're writing as to whether you're leaving too many hints behind, not enough, or just enough. I nearly deleted the line 'He wants to hate you.' several times because I thought it might give too much away, but there were enough depths to his past fixation with her it was still adequately shocking when Daphne found his stalkery stash. Speaking of, the portrait was indeed of Daphne, but it was one of the first things Michael tried to do via the paint medium, and it didn't turn out quite right, but the innocence of the girl in the picture kind of added to his illusions about Daphne. I think most of the problem is that it turned out how he wanted it to do rather than how it should've done.
Terry was a bit hard to add in because he knew Michael so well. I didn't want to spoil unintentionally. Yes, he knew that the portrait was of Daphne, as well as about Michael's thing for her. That's why he hated her at first; he knew how much it had affected Michael to have his illusions about Daphne shattered. As you know, he suspected her of toying with him for her own amusement. Sure, it wasn't Daphne's fault, but Michael was his friend and Daphne wasn't, so fixing the blame wasn't that difficult. Once he felt he could trust her and that she legitimately cared for Michael's well-being, he opened up to her. He's not a bad guy; he's loyal to his friends and will do what he had to do to protect them. And considering what happened to Anthony, he wasn't about to lose another one.
I honestly was surprised that no one thought domestic!Daphne wasn't plausible, as a pure-blood girl who's never cooked in her life. However, to me, cooking and potions aren't all that different, and all ingredients react a certain way to various stimuli. Daphne was already a good potioneer, so it sort of came naturally to her. It also is, in my head, one of the things that changed both Terry's and Michael's opinions about Daphne - brought her down to earth, so to speak.
And picks...I thought that I had fixed the entopic/ectopic error, but I must have missed it. Will fix. And vest/waistcoat...oops. It's me being American again. I'm surprised my beta let it go, considering how consummately British she is, but meh. Stuff happens. LOL at the pirate thing, though. It makes me giggle.
Overall, I'm so glad that this fic is getting such a good reception. There were a lot of things I buried in it, hoping that readers would pick up on it. For the LJ fest it was for, it didn't get nearly the reception it has on MNFF, but you lot are so fantastic. Thanks for following, and I look forward to hearing from you again!
That was not the ending I was expecting.
Well, strictly speaking, there are still three more chapters, so it's not the end. However, that you weren't expecting it? Goody. >:)
Daphne definitely has some shenanigans to sort out. Wish her luck! Update on the second, because it's a fine day to update!
Ooohhh... I knew something bad was going to happen, but I thought it was going to be a complication from the medication causing her to pass out up there. This is way better. Anxiously waiting for the next bit!
You know, I hadn't remotely considered medical complications. Considering the odds against it and Daphne's health, I knew that the Big Plot Thing would have to come from left field. Enjoy that twist. :)
Thanks for following. I don't seldom get to write things that fall into your 'yay let's read' list, so I'm glad we get to go through this together. <3
NO!!!!!!!!!! Don't kidnap Daphne, backwards-minded people.
Yeah...people officially suck. :/ Well, update in a few days, so stay tuned!
I sincerely apologise for bombarding you with reviews, but I'm afraid I simply can't resist!
I love how you've created this whole world, with Daphne/Michael/Theo/Terry/Anthony all intertwined and with deep histories and human emotions. I thought Michael's breakdown was extremely well handled, conveying the complex nature of his feelings in a way that not only developed the plot and his back story further but also allowed Daphne an opportunity to show everyone (including herself) how much she'd changed and how much she cared.
The revelation that Michael had always been in love with her was not altogether unexpected, and was perfect in that it justified all of his actions towards her, in a way which didn't seem at all contrived, but in fact deeply touching and heartbreaking. The character you've developed for Daphne is perfect, flawed, human, but in tune with the Slytherin traits we know her to possess, yet impossible to dislike. Much like Terry said Michael wants to hate her, it's impossible to dislike Daphne despite her flaws.
I'm dying for an update (I must admit I've been obsessively checking for updates every half hour! hahaha I apologise for the mild stalking there...), this is one of the best characterised fics I've ever read. Ever.
Your impatient (and obsessed!) reader,
You, dear, may review as often as you like. Every time I get a review like this one, a baby kitten somewhere in the world gets cuddled. You make me want to adopt you, hehe. :D
To me, every story has another story behind it and another story behind that one, and so on. An audience in my opinion should be able to touch some of these and feel their presence while reading. It, as you said, builds complex character dynamics and plot depth, which make for an interesting read. I don't profess to be great at it, but I do make a conscious effort to give readers bang for their buck (or content for their word count). This story was exceedingly difficult in this respect, as it was never supposed to be this long. But I sort of fell in love with my characters and had to give them a riper, richer existence.
Michael is truly tragic in some respects in this story. He spent so many years being in love with Daphne's exterior and what he wanted her to be like that when he actually started to know her, such as in shared NEWT classes that they normally would've had with their own houses, he felt hurt and disillusioned that she was nothing like he thought she would be. It was easier to, as Terry put it, want to hate her. But he got the chance to know the real her, and you said it best: it's impossible to dislike Daphne once you get to know her. She's a bit shallow, but it was what she knew of life, not a conscious decision. And speaking on that, waaaaaaaait until you see what comes next, lol. Brain = asplode.
There will be a shiny new update some time tomorrow before I go to work (about midnight BST), so I shall put you out of your misery. PS - I update every three days, just so you know the schedule. And as for being one of the best characterised fics...I don't know whether that's true, but to know you enjoy it so much makes every minute of the forced solitude for two weeks to manically meet my fest deadline worth it. And stalking? Go ahead. I'm not that interesting. Really, I'm not, lol. Ciao for now!
That was a powerful chapter.The dialogue was brilliant.
I'm glad you like it. The beginning of the story was a fair bit lighter and fluffier than the latter half, so be prepared for some turning of the screw! Thanks for stopping in. :)
PS. I'd really like the way Terry act in this chapter, and Theo too. What a story Michael have to carry around, though I can't quit see why he blames himself. I mean Michael were fighting too, right? How could he have stopped Tony kill that girl. What Michael could have done something about, and that is only maybe, is Tony's guilt. I mean maybe Michael could have prevented Tony's suicide if he hadn't been in the hospital, wounded. I hope we here more about why Michael have a hard time.
I take it you understand why Terry was so disparaging toward Daphne at first. He knew about Michael's fixation and was certain Daphne was messing with his head. He only opened up to her when he was sure she honestly cared about Michael and his well-being.
I know I touch upon this at some point in the story, but it's not spoilery just to tell you now. Michael feels guilty because he was training to be a Healer, learning how to help people, and he couldn't even help his own best mate. He didn't even notice that Tony was in that much distress. Michael just thought he had some mental problems, but not the kind that made him want to kill himself. THAT is a burden to carry around, the idea that he COULD HAVE noticed that something needed to happen but he didn't. It made him sick just to look at himself. And yes, it made him prickly and blunt.
I think you mistake the timeline. When Tony killed himself, it was over three months after the battle, and Michael was no longer hospitalised and was already in the Healer programme. That was why Daphne connected the dots about Tony's death date and the current date in the story. She figured it out.
Anyway, another update will come in a couple days. I'm glad you're enjoying the story and that some things were clarified for you. :D
After last chapter I knew that Michael where in love with Daphne, I mean it's pretty obvious when someone wants to hate you. It's said that hate can only exist if there have/are been love. What I hadn't seen was that Daphne would find it so soon, that the piece would fall into place in this chapter, I though there would go a few more chapters.
By the way, still like this story, and I can't wait for your updates. I often check this story in the morning, GMT-1 + summer time, which makes GMT.
Well, 'love' is a weird thing to term Michael's feelings toward Daphne. He drew her picture and obsessed over her and then started to idealise her. He fell in love with the idea of her, but wanted to hate her when he found out what she was really like up close. That was why he was so hostile toward her at first; she reminded him of a shattered illusion. No one likes to see their own errors in judgement.
This whole story had to happen in a brisk manner, or else the characters would have to sit and think too long about what they were doing. Daphne wouldn't have volunteered at St Mungo's if she hadn't acted on the impulse to do so.
Anyway, off to respond to the other review!
Wow those are some fast updates! Keep them coming. I never thought I would ever read a story where I would love the minor characters in hp so much but you have done it. I love this story!
Updates will keep coming fast, because the story is already written. I've just had to code them and make minor adjustments to allow for MNFF's ratings policies.
Minor characters are my passion. It is my singular goal to take characters that people either don't care about or maybe have negative preconceptions about and change their minds. I'm glad you've been introduced to the richness that can lie between the lines of the books' pages. They're there, waiting for their story to be told. I like to tell their stories. :)
Thanks for reading! Update tomorrow (or later today, now that I look at the clock)!
Jess, I love your writing. And I'm anxiously awaiting the next installment. Well done.
I'm glad you're still into the story. These characters were so fun to work with that it almost doesn't surprise me that I wrote this whole thing in like two weeks. :)
Should be an update tomorrow. <3
This is such a great story with "real" characters who are less than perfect but are the result of their up bringing. Please let us know about what happens to Rose. Good writing.
Screwed up characters are like crack to me, so most of mine end up being earthy people with problems and angst. It may be why Post-Hogwarts fics tend to be my niche, because there are lots of problems with coping there. I'm glad they feel real to you. :)
And as for Rose...her story does have a resolution. Stay tuned, and thank you for reading!
Oh, I am loving the speedy updates! And Michael's grumpy disposition. I solemnly swear to never judge a character before their story ever again! :) ~ AG
I'm glad I could change your mind about Michael. He's always been a bit of a dark one in canon, as both Harry and Ron found him a bit 'creepy'. He's even cast in the films as 'creepy boy'. It's hard to preserve that but still make him a protagonist, but I think the gruff Healer mantle works for him.
The updates will continue to be speedy (new one tomorrow). The story is finished and just waiting to be posted. Hopefully you will continue to have your expectations turned upside-down. Much Stuff will Happen later in the fic, so here's hoping you will keep liking what you see. :)
I'm glad you're enjoying the story. Thank you for reading. :) Update in a few days!
Good update. I am liking this story more and more. Your characters are very real.I have just checked out your other stories and what a wealth of stuff to go at.
Welcome back! I'm glad you're enjoying the story thus far and that it's getting better as it goes along. The beginning moved a bit slow because of the amount of character introduction I needed, but I think it paid off.
Anyway, thanks for the support, and watch for an update in a few days!
Oooh I finally got to read chapter three!
...and it was well worth the wait! The complexity of your characters makes them so human, for instance you didn't make Theo cold or uncaring, which would have been easy, but instead made him loving, just not in the way Daphne wishes he was.
Michael for me is perfect; intelligent, stubborn, and of course a little abrasive. I loved the line 'There wasn’t a straight guy at Hogwarts who didn’t know your cup size', as it hinted at his possible attraction to her, but in a subtle way.
The plot development was brilliant, and Daphne's realisation that she could do something to help girls like her didn't seem at all contrived, but entirely logical and fitting in with the person you've established her to be.
Can't wait for more!
Hello again! I may or may not have sneakily lowered the rating so the warnings didn't pop up. Every once in a while, when the system fudges up, those of us who write mainly higher-rated stories do that so people can actually read our stuff.
Theo was always nice, really. That was part of the reason Daphne latched onto him when he looked interested. She didn't want what happened to her older sister to happen to her, and she knew, after years of being acquainted with Theo, that he wouldn't do that to her.
Michael, well...he's got his reasons for being a jerk, which you will learn about later in the story, but yeah. He's kind of like Dr House a little bit - with an eye patch, hehe. And even though Daphne nothing-ed him before that day, she is a smart girl who knows talent when she sees it.
Daphne wants to help because it felt damned unfair to her that no one was presenting *her* with options during her little crisis, and she just happened to be lucky to get the one person willing to help her outside the confines of regulation. I suppose she wouldn't have volunteered before, but experiencing such a thing first-hand, I believe, changes one's perspective on what's important. Not to mention how scary it was, even though she was an adult. Poor Rose. :/
Anyway, I shall discontinue my ramble. Thanks for reading! New chapter either later today or very early tomorrow. <3
I loved chapters one and two, but much to my disgust it's not letting me access chapter three (or the previous chapters) all of a sudden!
Daphne is very well developed, she seems human and flawed, with elements of Slytherin in her but she isn't defined by it, which I like. Her insecurities are completely believable, and I felt a huge level of sympathy for her following the disastrous encounter with Theo.
I liked how you didn't chuck Michael into the first chapter, instead letting Daphne develop first.
I hope to be able to read the third chapter soon, once it decides to let me!
I love your work,
Hmm, odd that you couldn't access the chapter. We did have some difficulty a while back with readers not being able to access 6th/7th year/Professors stories due to a warning pop-up glitch. I hope that's not the case, because that was a bear to fix for the site coder.
Anyway, I'm glad you like the pace of the story. I think the set-up with Daphne's character is the most important to the whole story, as she is the one who will be experiencing the most throughout the fic. You'll get to see plenty of Michael later, but the structure dictated that he would come up a bit later in the story and NOT in the first few parts. I'm happy you agree, hehe.
Thanks for your read and review, and I hope the glitch thingy sorts itself out and you can read more. There should be a new chapter up tomorrow/the day after. :)