Really cute story
Ooh, Soraya, this was really nice! I loved the slight bittersweet tones, and how it started off as rather frustrating for Lily but ended up being a special mother-son moment. I know that often young mothers do not feel ready to raise a child, and I realize that Lily is no exception. However, The bond of a mother and child is special, I’m relieved that she understood in the end what was important. Your fic sums up the ups and downs of parenthood quite well. :)
Lily, I think, was nicely developed in this story. She and James had married at a very young age, and with a war going on, it must have been difficult for Lily to raise Harry. I feel that her snappiness towards James, though wrong, is justified because of all the pressure she is under. To add to that, her need for sleep and her fatigued muscles, not to mention her strained relationship with Petunia, all must have piled up on her, causing her to act in such a manner. The line Lily is only Harry’s milk machine, really, is a very caustic expression of just how upset she is, because it quite aptly conveys her frustration and her despondency at herself.
Speaking of Harry, I hadn’t really considered that Harry would be premature, but now that I think of it, it seems sensible. Harry was always described as being skinny and small for his age, and though that might have been due to the Dursleys starving him, I think this is a rather good explanation as well. It also presses down on Lily -- since handling a premature baby is far more stressing that taking care of a healthy baby, further explaining her distress.
Maybe, for once, Harry doesn’t want his milk or his bum cleaned up. Maybe he just wants his mother. This line actually made me so depressed, because I thought that I was actually in Harry’s mind while reading this. It is short and simple, without any complicated wordings, rather like a child’s mentality. The latter line has such an innocent ring to it, too. This, I believe, is the turning point for Lily’s emotions, the point where she goes from aggravated to sad because she hasn’t given Harry any time -- when she realizes where she went wrong and she tries to redeem herself.
The following paragraphs are very adorable due to all the “I love you”s, kisses and hugs, and while reading them I couldn’t help but tear up a bit, remembering that in a year’s time they would be dead and Harry would be left alone. Frankly, I don’t know what would have happened if Lily hadn’t realized how much Harry meant to her. Would she be able to stand up to Voldemort? Would she have died and left Harry with the protection of Lily’s love? Maybe she wouldn’t have.
Leaving aside these off-putting questions, I think James was very in character, especially by calling Lily “babe”. I’m sure he would have called Lily nicknames she didn’t appreciate, simply to annoy her. I also agree to the fact that Harry would be more comfortable around James -- from the book I think that James seems to have that charm that drew everyone in, despite of how cocky he could be. Lily’s ire towards James is also reasonable here too, because as a mother she would want her child to be as comfortable around her as Harry is towards James. However, I’m glad that things worked out in the end.
My only quibble is that this story is short -- I would have loved to see a bit more going on here. But I absolutely loved the last line and how optimistic it is, because despite starting off with dismal undertones, you’ve ended with hope and love. I also liked the connotation here -- though I’m not sure if you meant it -- that despite of being in a war, it is ultimately love and hope that leads the way.
This was an excellent read, Soraya, thank you so much! Hope to see more from you!
Author's Response: Nadiaaaaaaaaaa! Thank you so much for the fabulous review :D
This was a story I had in my head for a long time, and I am just so glad you enjoyed it. I’m not a mother, ha, but I think this was written when I had a strange fondness for babies/baby stories at the time, hence why it had a definite maternal feel. But also, I think this was written around the time my baby cousin was born, and I had heard a lot complaining from my aunt (his mother), so yeah, I wanted to expand on the idea of a mother-son relationship not necessarily being perfect but still being very much special.
The thing about Lily’s age is something I sometimes forget, if I'm honest, and I'm glad you thought I did a good job with that. Again, I really wanted to put across the problems of motherhood, and I definitely think they were exacerbated because of Lily’s age and, yes, her relationship with her sister at the time.
Hahaha, the bit about Harry being premature was just something I thought of on the spot, but yes, now you come to mention it, it does make sense given Harry was skinny and small for his ages. I know quite a few people who have had premature babies, so I can totally sympathise with their stress. :(
I’m sad parts made you depressed, but I did kind of go for that, ha, and yes, I think this story is different in a way from my others because it’s a lot more simply worded. I'm glad you liked that line :)
I’m really flattered you thought the whole mother-son interaction was adorable! I’ll be honest; that bit was difficult to write because I kept thinking, “Is this cheesy?” but ultimately I did want a slightly more optimistic overtone to the story.
YAYAY, you liked James! :D I do love writing him. I personally would love it if my hubby called me babe (or if my hubby was James, full stop, lol) but I can see why Lily found it annoying. And I think, yes, James would have been good with Harry, but also, Lily was good with Harry -- it was just that Lily wasn’t paying as much attention to Harry as James was.
I would have loved to write more, but honestly, I’m not sure what else to add. I might write a followup one day; we’ll see ;)
Thank you again, Nadia, for the lovely review! This one is definitely one of my underreviewed stories so I am so happy you decided to review it. ♥
Soraya! This was such a sweet little fic!
I loved how there was so much in such little. Lily getting a tad irritated with baby Harry was so cute. And hmm... I never wondered if Harry was premature and all that stuff. Although, I did read in a fic years ago-- Remus told Harry that Lily was in labour for like 24 hours before she delivered him. :p
This describes early parenthood very well, yes. It's not be easy to manage a baby (though I really have no clue). I hear these babies crying in these public places and I'm like, O.o
You know what, this is like the first James/Lily fic I've ever read. I have always read only trio era or Next-gen fics and I so, so loved this. I loved James's characterisation too. Sounded so much like him.
And so, I'm off to make your banner. :D I'll download some pictures tonight and start on it after college tomorrow, ok! Fabulous story, Soraya! :*
Author's Response: POOJA! Thank you so much for the lovely review :)
Haha, I'm quite close to my aunty who had her first baby at the end of last year -- and she's thirty-one, lol, and yet she found it hard, too, so I wanted to portray the problems with being a mum as accurately as possible. My aunty was a good place to start ;) And a lot of the babies in my stories tend to be premature. I'm not sure why.
Oh, 24 hours isn't *that* bad -- my friend, who was only fifteen when she had her baby (*sigh*), spent a week in labour before she finally had a Caesarean. :-/ Anywho, I'm not very good with babies either, excluding a cousin of mine in Bangladesh -- he wet himself on everyone, everyone except for me, lol. And he never used to cry when I carried him :P
O.o I didn't know this is the first J/L fic you've ever read! Whoa. You should definitely check out Gina/Gmariam's J/L stories -- they're wayyyy better than mine, haha. As are Croll's. And I LOVE James, though I've now divorced him and took Louis instead, lol. I'm glad you liked James's characterisation, anyway, especially as he didn't appear in it much.
Take as much time as you need with the banner -- no rush :) I hope you didn't mind reading it, lol -- it just means you get a better feel of the story for the banner :D Thank youuuuu for the fabulous review, Pooja! I appreciate it a lot :)
Sorayaaa--this was lovely. You characterised both Lily and James so, so well in such a short amount of time. I think you did a very good job describing what having a newborn is like, what with getting no sleep, and the baby making you practically crazy, and then the baby smiles and it's all worth it.
Anyway, this was such a sweet, fluffy piece and I'm sorry I've forgotten how to review.
Author's Response: LILY! Thank youuuu for the lovely review! Haha, my cousin was born last December, and it's the first time I've really seen a baby develop right from the beginning, so I guess that;s why there's a lot of description of baby!Harry. And my aunty is constantly complaining about her baby keeping her up, lol.
Heart youuuu :)
Soraya! Thank youuuuuu! That was absolutely lovely!! Truly. I loved it. What's crazy is that I could totally picture this happening because I clearly remember it happening to me--the late nights, the fatigue, the crying (hers and mine, lol), and one night just standing in the hallway with my husband almost laughing hysterically because it's the middle of the night and we just had no idea what to do with this crying, wiggling, screaming new person keeping us awake. So well done on capturing that!
Lily was well done and I loved James's supernatural calm. I also liked that she called him on calling her 'babe,' lol. And Harry's first smile was the sweetest way to end it. Lovely. Thank you so much!!!
Author's Response: Yayayayayyyyyy! I really am not bothered that this doesn't have more reviews, because I got a lovely Gina review and you didn't hate it! :D
Okay, as a teenager, I am so alien to the whole motherhood thing obviously, lol, but I am pretty close to an aunt of mine who recently (as in, December) had a baby. She was so shattered for teh first couple of weeks, so I could tell that being a mum is very, very far from easy, haha. It means a lot to me that you could remember it happening to you, because that *hopefully* means it was at least vaguely realistic, lol, and coming from a mum, too, I shall take that as a high compliment :)
I personally would love to be called babe (lol) by my hubby, but I can see Lily getting annoyed at James for that :P so I'm glad you liked that. I'm really pleased you didn't hate it and that you thought it was lovely :) Thank youuuuuuu for the review and happy belated birthday!