I like this. I think you've captured a certain something, which despite your professed dislike of Harry and Ginny, neatly captures what it is between them.
Your poem gently lilts along, with such beautiful imagery. - 'The green wave's crash' and 'gates of ash'. A very simple rhyme but it aids the flow of the poem.
However, I do think the last line lets the poem down. It's as if you were struggling with a rhyme for 'you' so just decided to use 'two'. The thing is, we know Harry has two eyes, so the line is just rather basic and does nothing to either sum up the poem or end it with any satisfaction. I think you should really think about rewording the line or that last stanza because it doesn't do justice to the rest of them poem.
It is beautiful and clearly H&G, so well done for someone who hates them
Author's Response: Well, I don't hate them... I just don't like it as much as what I initially thought was going to happen (Harry/Luna, 'cause OotP.) Thanks, anyways, for the review!
Wow! You have a great writing style. You should definitely think of joining Poetry Anyone? in the beta forums! You would be a great addition! :) that is, if you haven't already joined. :)
Anyways, I really loved the last line- it was amazing! Keep up the good work!
Author's Response: I'm thinking about joining PA? but my poetry output is SO SLOW, lol. But, anyways thank you for the kind words!
How can you not like H/G?
Lovely poem, though!~Nidhi
Author's Response: I've been racking my brains for five years trying to figure out what sits wrong with me about H/G. I wish I could give a rational explanation for it. I could give a quite unreasonable explanation -- I've always wanted Harry/Luna to be a thing.