Reviewer: alex13
Date: 10/23/12 19:26
Chapter: If No One Will Listen

A great poem! I think this really describes Harry and Hermione's relationship growing up really well. I really liked how you described Harry at the begging of the poem. Again great poem! :)

Author's Response: Aw, thank you! You flatter me too much, alex13. But it keeps my spirits up, so don't stop! *chuckles* I hope you continue to enjoy writing and reading! And look out for more of my stuff, because it abounds aplenty. (No joke...) ~Nagini Riddle

Reviewer: teh tarik
Date: 10/23/12 18:40
Chapter: If No One Will Listen

Lovely piece of writing. The opening images were striking - I particularly loved the part about "growing antlers" and "ashy grey". The final stanza was full of warmth and compassion and hope and I loved it!

The only thing that I feel might be better (and this is just my personal opinion...and it mightn't be too helpful since I don't write poetry) would be if you removed words like "tentatively" and perhaps "sombrely" as well. I find adverbs tricky, and even more so in poetry. I think they're not necessary since your other lovely descriptions already evoke a sombre tone.

Once again, lovely piece! Hope you write more =)

Author's Response: Oh, thank you!!! I can see what you mean about adverbs, since too many of them can clog up a piece, which I am sometimes guilty of. :) And if you want to read more, check out my author page. As alex13 can attest to, I have written pretty much poetry for the last five months, and it's filled up quite a chunk of my stories. Thanks again for reviewing! ~Nagini Riddle

You must login (register) to review.
Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
Makers of Fine Wands by CanisMajor 1st-2nd Years
Ollivander of Croton arrives in Athens in 382 BC with big dreams, noneof which...
James and Me by Northumbrian 6th-7th Years
Annabel is having a bad day. Her sudden and unexpected meeting with a face from...
Tom Riddle and the Cave of Living Waters by alittletiefling 6th-7th Years
What would happen if Tom Marvolo Riddle had been adopted by well-meaning squibs?...
FEATURED
It Takes Two to Tango by lucca4 3rd-5th Years
They cannot keep doing this; it is only a matter of whose resolve will break...
In The Heat Of The Morning by welshdevondragon 3rd-5th Years
Summary: In the heat of the morning, Katie and Leanne lie in the grounds...
Can't Fight the Moonlight by Acacia Carter 6th-7th Years
A life-changing disaster at work drives Neville Longbottom to seek aid from...
The History Teacher by iLuna17 6th-7th Years
Maybe he didn’t just love history, maybe he loved being a history teacher.
white on white by Padfoot11333 6th-7th Years
Three vignettes about scars, love, and sex.
CATEGORIES