Reviews For Save You
Reviewer: Oregonian
Date: 01/15/14 3:10
Chapter: Save You

Hi, Nagini. Me again, here to review another one of your exquisitely imaginative poems.

Oh Merlin, I really like this one. Severus is teetering in that brief time period between when he realizes that Lily is in danger and when she finally dies. It is your talent to take a little moment in time and really see into it, see everything that is going on in that instant.

This poem is full of great lines, and one virtue of your poetry is that you use words in fresh, unexpected ways. You do not just string a bunch of standard phrases together. Here’s a good example of what I mean: I yearn to be your savior, prohibit your precious blood from being spilt, that I perhaps, could be the one, could be a life changer.

Here are some other bits I particularly liked: wretched Time is swift and my newfound morals. Doubts are wild and mockingly free is a wonderful way to say “I cannot control or suppress my doubts.”

I also much enjoyed the recurring rhyme scheme”it tied the poem into a neatly controlled bundle”and the variable length of the lines, between ten and eighteen syllables, keeps the poem from becoming singsongy.

One question: in the line Destroyed as if by the enemy pranger, I do not recognize the word “pranger” and didn’t find it in my dictionary. (My word processing program didn’t recognize it either and tried to change it into the word “prancer”, like Santa’s reindeer.) Is this a typo, or is it a regular word, or one that you coined, like “beseechment” in line 4, which works fine, by the way, because we immediately know what it means.

I always enjoy reading your poetry, and one of the reasons is that it always has something new. Nice job.

Vicki

Author's Response: Aw, thank you! And "pranger" is a german word for a punishment device, like a pillory. :) I was hard pressed for a rhyme, and a rhyming site gave me that word... :p Keep reading! ~Nagini

Reviewer: crbluvsravenclaw
Date: 12/05/12 17:47
Chapter: Save You

Today, I got an email notification that your poem got submitted on here. So I had to come over and read it! I really loved this poem, by the way and I agree with poor Severus! It's been so long since I have read one of your great poems and I'm glad that I get to now!

I have simply missed talking to you, though I don't know you. Please don't think that I am a creeper.... I have written so many more stories on Booksie, though I am getting away from Harry Potter fanfic. I still write it, but it's less and less. I barely come to this site anymore. But yesterday I have joined a new website called Wattpad and it's like Booksie, just with some differences. I really wish that you were back on Booksie because you have fans their too! :D Well, I better go. It was nice talking to you though! :D

~crbluvsravenclaw, future author, Cris!

Author's Response: Cris- I have missed you! Why don't you check out all my stories on here? I have so many new ones! I'm at, I believe, 43 stories. Thanks for the review! I'm glad to see you back. :)

You must login (register) to review.
Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
MIT: Entente Cordial by Northumbrian 6th-7th Years
A strange and seemingly inexplicable death in London's West End brings an unlikely...
Allegiance by ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor 6th-7th Years
During his final year at Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy had few illusions about where...
Through the Mines by Nagini Riddle 1st-2nd Years
Tom Riddle remarks on the power he held while at the orphanage and at school.Written...
FEATURED
CATEGORIES