Chapter 3 - Distractions
But hahaha let me first laugh at Ron blundering into a pivotal moment, It made me giggle, as did that momentary lapse of Snape's solid demeanour. I wonder if I should write Severus/Fleur. Fleverus. YES!
Ahem. Wow. As I said, this pair has chemistry that - er - showered down on my biology, after a fashion. Their relationship is amazingly sensual, but I also love how they show their vulnerability to each other. I never did think about Fleur being that lonely, with her girl friends unwilling to be not biased, and boys preferring to droll rather than lend an honest ear. That was startling.
Tonks. Oh dear. I now have the hottest hots for her. I've always adored Tonks, but never felt so much attraction towards her. Her characterisation was fabulous as well!
But Bill and Fleur... that's like a sacred pairing ... so sorry, Tonks. You do get Remus in the end.
Author's Response: FLAPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You must write it.
I demand FLAPERY!
So pleased you liked this. I had horrible issues with it, having started initially for the Rainbow Challenge then stopping when I decided I hated it. But then I liked the peaches bit at the beginning, and after rereading decided to rewrite and add (and add a lot lot more - ooops)
Mmm, for some reason Fleur didn't come over as that hot, but I think that's because I was writing from her POV and so while we were experiencing her thoughts and reactions, it was her reactions to Tonks that we were reading. I've never written smutty Tonks ... not sure I can believe that - ha ha.
Yeah, I had to split them up because Bill and Fleur are just too hot not to meet. If I dared do a Tarentino and Kill Bill (geddit) then I'd reunite them, but alas, I believe half teh flist would rewrite the scenario and Kill Croll.
Thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu ~Carole~
Chapter 3 - Distractions
Wow. You have officially converted me to Flonks. They are an extremely hot couple, and the smut scenes between them were gorgeously written :).
What I loved most about this chapter was the realization of how similar Tonks and Fleur are -- both strong, independent women, who both blame themselves for circumstances out of their control. Because of this, it's so easy to see that despite their relationship not quite lasting, they still care about one another and can maintain a friendship in the coming years of the war. So even though part of me wanted you to add an AU warning to this story and have the two of them run off to Calais and get married, in the end their inevitable parting left me complacent. I love how you have Bill meeting Fleur at the end of the Third Task, and since we see later how happy Fleur is with Bill it makes everything more sweet than bitter.
I love this story, and I know it's going to do fabulously in the Cotillion. I would ask for a follow-up, but I'm not that greedy, so I'll just plant the idea in your mind somehow… :)
Author's Response: Thank you so very much - especially the comment on the smut because I very nearly left that out. I had such problems trying to make this work because at the back of my mind I love Bill/Fleur and Remus/Tonks, so I knew it wasn't going to be AU. Anyway, I had to add a little smut because otherwise the chemistry just didn't seem to be there :( . Hmm, maybe they could run off to Calais and then the other marriages will be bigamous - heh heh. God, Molly would have several merry fits if that were true.
Hmmm, follow up. Perhaps that's my AU tha i one day need to write. Thank youuuuuuu ~Carole~
Chapter 2 -Flesh and Bone
I guess I missed the last time this was updated, because I was pleasantly surprised to find not one but two chapters for me to read - yay!
I loved this chapter. Contrasted with Roger's awkward kissing, it's easy to see why Fleur is so attracted to Tonks - and the heat between them is far more tangible than it is between Fleur and Roger. I absolutely adore the scene at the Yule Ball, the ending scene, especially when Tonks and Fleur run into Snape - hahaha, that made me smile. This is all written so beautifully -- Tonks's question about tomorrow really highlighted (for me, knowing this story probably won't defy canon) how ephemeral their relationship is doomed to be.
Off to read the next chapter now - this is brilliant :).
Author's Response: Thank youuuuuuuuu. Glad you enjoyed this chapter because this was the point where I was wondering what the heck I'd started - ha ha. I did like writing the Snape bit and poor old Roger who I'm really not very nice to - ever. Sigh, perhaps I need to write him a story. Hmmmmmmm.
Thank you again for the lovely reviews and all your support. It is much appreciated. ~Carole~
Chapter 1 - Peaches
Hi Carole :)
What a fabulous story! I remember you saying on LJ that you weren’t sure about it, but honestly, you shouldn’t be so worried, because I’ve enjoyed reading this so far and think you deserve far more reviews. I’ve read quite a few Flonks stories before, and I can say with certainty that this is the best one I’ve ever read. What I love about your writing is how you make characters who are often heavily abused in the fandom, like Fleur (but also Lavender and Romilda), likeable and human, in spite of her Veela heritage. And, having read both Fleur and Tonks in your writing before (in Coup de Foudre and Apparently Asleep respectively), it was no surprise to me that they were both characterised incredibly well here, too, and that their characters, above all, were what pushed the story forward.
First, though, the style of this story was one of its many strengths; it was dialogue-heavy, and it worked because of the French accent, which was never distracting but only added to Fleur’s character. I especially liked her mistakes in English, such as when she says “feetsteps”, and her misunderstandings of English sayings, like “taking the mick” and “scrapes”. It was funny and realistic, with the snippets of French making Fleur’s English sound really broken. There was also something really sweet about Tonks correcting Fleur when she did slip up in English which made Tonks’s character even more caring and brought out her Hufflepuff qualities.
I loved just how vulnerable Fleur appeared in this. While I think she put on a front of fussiness and perfection in GoF, I agreed with Tonks in that it was a relief that Fleur was “Flesh and bones like the rest of us”. That was a great line, and the fact that Fleur was doubting her own capabilities and also had insecurities, like her thoughts about her so-called friends, made her much more of a sympathetic character. She’s a lot more relatable here than in canon, and I could understand why she wanted someone who would disagree with her and tease her, something that Roger clearly is not. I was also reminded of how young Fleur is in this, by her having the same worries any normal teenager would have about her friends distancing themselves from her and Fleur perhaps not fitting in much, in spite of her beauty. I can remember you saying something about how sexuality can be really fluid at a younger age, and I guess that’s true for Fleur, because her attraction to Tonks as “Edwin” doesn’t seem to go even when she finds out Tonks is really a woman.
Speaking of which, I wasn’t sure “Edwin” was Tonks at first, but it was confirmed when she made the comment about Cleaning Spells. I think that’s a mark of how convincing Fleur’s narrative was (even in the third person), because I was never completely sure it was Tonks until she finally revealed herself. And her characterisation was so spot on, exactly like Tonks was in canon -- I liked her sheepish comment after Fleur first kissed her: “Er, well, you started it, but ... er... yeah ... sorry.” There’s something so unapologetic and cheeky about your Tonks that I couldn’t help but laugh, because I think it’s just like Tonks to point out that Fleur was the one who started it and for her to find the situation funny more than anything. But at the same time, Tonks was thoughtful, too, particularly through her gesture of giving Fleur the salve for the dragon task. Also, I really liked the moment when Tonks morphed into Bellatrix and explained how good looks didn’t necessarily mean anything; it reminded me of how Tonks clearly had issues, too, with her own family. Like Fleur, that kind of imperfection is what makes Tonks such a well-rounded character for me.
As for Roger, I liked that while he obviously wasn’t the right person for Fleur (the fumbling with the coffee, the fact that Fleur didn’t enjoy kissing him), he wasn’t painted as a bad person as such, which was a welcome change. For example, I liked that he kept trying to reassure her that she should have come first and that her dragon was the fiercest, even if Fleur might have wanted him to disagree with her a little more. I also thought it was interesting that Fleur, despite her incompatibility with him, still regarded him as “the one ally she seemed to have here”; the emphasis on her loneliness really brought out just how human Fleur was. I also thought Roger’s considerateness and effort in taking dancing lessons was actually rather endearing and made him likeable, in a way, so while I don’t ship them, I can see at least the initial attraction Fleur might have had with Roger.
Although your story was mostly character-driven, I liked how you weaved the plot in with GoF. I was able to follow the timeline really easily, especially with the inclusion of the Hogsmeade visit and then the first task, followed by the Yule Ball. I was intrigued, also, by Tonks’s assignment -- I was wondering how you would explain Tonks impersonating Savage -- but it made perfect sense to me, since she did say she was really good at concealment and disguise because she was a Metamorphmagus. I can definitely see that happening, and having read several gender bender SSP stories, I have to say that this is one of the most unique due in part to the lack of Polyjuice Potion.
I thought the two chapters flowed well, and I liked the slow progression of Fleur’s attraction to Tonks, starting with her attraction to who she thought was Edwin, especially with the opening image of the wizard eating the peach. It’s such a simple thing that drew Fleur to Tonks in the first place, even if she did think Tonks was a man, but it was also very sensual, and considering your qualms about if the story was sexy, I definitely think it was from the outset. The physical chemistry was evident from the start, as I think Tonks doesn’t act like a man at all (even if she isn’t particularly ladylike either), and I like that Fleur notices this, too, however subconscious those thoughts were to begin with -- like Tonks’s hand not being sweaty and her not kissing Fleur’s hand in the way I suspect a lot of guys probably did with Fleur. And when they finally kissed properly at the Yule Ball, it was amusing to see Fleur lose her cool a bit and at last voice her sustained attraction to Tonks, even knowing she was not Edwin.
Overall, Carole, I thoroughly enjoyed reading this. I would really love to know where things go from here, and I eagerly await the next chapter :)
Author's Response: I really should have replied to this a long long time ago, but I was, quite honestly, gobsmacked by the fabulousness of the review, so didn't know how to reply. Thank you so much for this, for as you know I have had huge issues with this which lead to me adding, deleting, then adding smut and then trying to keep it under the 15k (which it is - thankfully).
Thanks again. My response is inadequete, but I very much appreciate it. :) ~Carole~
Chapter 1 - Peaches
This was cute and fun.
Author's Response: Hahahhah - yes, I was trying to think how someone angry and hearing that strange name for the first time would say it, and Nympa Tongs was the result! Thanks for the review. ~Carole~
Chapter 1 - Peaches
Ooh, I'm intrigued! I think the fact that this is set during the Triwizard Tournament, and not post-DH, makes the pairing all the more fun, namely because of the gift that Tonks gives her at the end. I loved the interactions between Fleur and "Edwin" - ha ha - and the way you write Tonks is such the best (perhaps it's because you are Tonks…hmm).
I can't wait for Chapter 2 :)
Author's Response: Thank youuuuuuu! I decided to set it at the Tri-Wizard because I think there's a lot more wriggle room with her characterisation and also Tonks's. They're not with their respective spouses at this point, so it's easier to write something with no guilt attached :)
Really appreciate the review - thanks again ~Carole~