Hi there! I’m Soraya. I’m seventeen years old and am a proud Muslim British Bangladeshi. I live in East London and have loved reading and writing from a young age. I’m rather obsessed with Harry Potter (aren’t we all?), tea (not a surprise considering I’m a Brit) and good grammar. Recently, I've also got into the Supernatural fandom. After watching the first episode, I had already fallen head over heels in love with Sam Winchester, so it's no surprise that I am now a huge SPN fangirl as well as a Potterhead.
My writing has changed quite a bit over the years, and I think you'll probably notice that, the further down my author page you go, the more the quality seems to drop :P I started posting stories on here at the age of fourteen, and at nearly eighteen, I can see how much my writing has improved since those Dark Ages. So, for that reason, I would advise you stick to the more recent stuff, if you choose to read anything of mine.
Just so you know, these are posted firstly according to what kind of pairing, if any, is in the story, and then in chronological order in accordance to my own canon, not necessarily the order in which they were posted.
My first chaptered fic. It’s terribly written, but I still have a place in my heart for it because of how much fun it was to write. This story has now been deleted on MNFF, but if you really, really want to read it, you can still find it on FF.net and HPFF. (I advise you don't, though :P)
Second Childishness and Mere Oblivion (James/Lily)
Written for Round One (Major Characters) of Madam Pomfrey’s Character Clinic Triathlon, this one-shot is about James and Lily’s relationship getting rockier and rockier after they left Hogwarts, especially when Lily is faced with the trials of being a wife and motherhood. A little smutty.
My Love is Always Here (James/Lily)
This was a belated birthday present for the wonderful Gina/Gmariam, aka the queen of James/Lily. This is mostly about Lily dealing with becoming a mother for the first time and the problems (as well as the joys) that come with that.
There's an Answer (Remus/Tonks)
Written for Sophie/The owl for SPEW Summer Swap IV. Tonks is sent on an interesting baby Auror assignment to do with werewolves. Remus and a dangerous Muggle are thrown into the mix, with interesting results.
Left Behind (Remus/Tonks)
An expanded version of one of my LoveNotes, written for SPEW. It's a missing moment set between OOTP and HBP, where in my head canon Remus and Tonks have been together, in secret, for a few weeks already and Remus is then told to go on his werewolf mission. Slightly smutty.
One and Only (Remus/Tonks)
Written for the lovely Alex/Ithinkrabis2people in the Ravenclaw Christmas Drabble Exchange. This is a missing moment set just after Tonks’s outburst to Remus in the hospital wing at the end of HBP.
Out of My Life (Harry/Ginny)
My only AU (kind of). I tweaked a small part of canon in this -- basically, Harry actually said goodbye to Ginny properly when he broke up with her. Very angsty, and this is only up for sentimental reasons, as I wrote it during The Dark Ages (aka when I was fourteen).
A Different Kind of Magic (Harry/Ginny)
Written for the You’re Having My Baby challenge at SIYE. Ginny finds out she’s pregnant, but Harry receives the news before her and therefore has to tell his wife. This was my first ever story at MNFF. It was written when I was thirteen, and it definitely shows.
A Different Kind of Magic 2: Parenthood (Harry/Ginny)
A sequel, obviously, to A Different Kind of Magic. Ginny goes into labour, and both Harry and Ginny realise what it means to be parents. Again, this was written from Back in the Days.
The Caustic Ticking of the Clock (Rowena/Helga)
Written for the Great Hall Cotillion, this story is my only Founders story so far, and it’s about Rowena and Helga’s secret relationship. I am proud of this one, which doesn’t usually happen :)
Catching Fire (James/Sirius)
This was written for SPEW 007. My prompt was “Embers”, and it’s set just after Remus’s second transformation with the Marauders. James is badly injured, and he and Sirius realise, inadvertently, that they might just have feelings for each other. I like the pairing but still think the story needs work. One day I will go back and edit.
Flicker and Fail (Katie/Leanne)
This was written forSecret SPEW, and my recipient was the absolutely fabulous Alex/welshdevondragon. It’s my take on Leanne and Katie’s relationship from way before they were even at Hogwarts as well as what eventually happens to Katie in HBP, when she was cursed.
Skinny Love (Louis/Lily)
Written for the 2013 Great Hall Cotillion. Set during Teddy and Victoire's wedding, Louis helps Lily come to terms with her bulimia. This one was pretty difficult to write.
Blood and Roses (Scorpius/Rose, Scorpius/Dominique, Dominique/OC)
Written for the Great Hall Mysterious Maychallenge, this was my first Next Generation fic about Scorpius, mostly, and the trials he faces after his daughter is murdered.
Broken Glass (Louis/Lily)
This is the story of when Loulily really began. After the deaths of his immediate family, Louis is finding it hard to cope, even six months later. Lily somehow helps. It’s a little smutty. I’m proud of this one, too :)
The Highway of Regret (Scorpius/Lily, Scorpius/Rose, Louis/Lily)
Also written for the Great Hall Cotillion. It’s my one and only Scily. This is all about secret relationships and mistakes people make. Lily’s angry at Louis, and Scorpius has just broken up with Rose; when Lily gets drunk in the pub, things... happen. :P
I Will Lay Down My Heart (Albus/Rose, Scorpius/Rose)
Written for Round Two (Minor Characters) of Madam Pomfrey’s Character Clinic Triathlon. Albus has been in love with Rose for years, but what happened with them when they were younger has put a dent in their relationship. It doesn’t help that Rose is actually in love with Scorpius, either. This is smutty too.
One More Night (Albus/Rose, Rose/Scorpius)
Companion piece to I Will Lay Down My Heart. This goes into more detail about Rose and Albus's changing relationship as well as the aftermath of the events in said companion story. Probably the smuttiest thing on my page. :D Written for the Great Hall Cotillion 2013.
This was written for the Great Hall-iday challenge for the Operation: Mistletoe prompt, and this was where my love for Loulily began.
This is about how five men in Potterverse dealt with remorse in different ways.
This poem is about how Remus feels about Sirius (not slashy, btw).
Written for the Magic in Music challenge over inPoetry, Anyone? This was set to the track “Obliviate” in DH1 and is about Hermione modifying her parents’ memories.
Written for the Goodbyechallenge in Poetry, Anyone? This was about saying goodbye, and how difficult it could be.
After All This Time
Written for the Deathly Hallows challenge inPoetry, Anyone?. I ship unrequited Snape/Lily, and this is probably the only time Snape will be on my author page, lol.
Written for the MC Kreacher challenge inPoetry, Anyone? This was written from the POV of Bill Weasley after his wife’s death.
Written for the Great Bannermakers’ Hallchallenge. The banner I picked had Merope Gaunt on it, and it’s probably my darkest story; it’s definitely the only one to have a dubious consent warning. It’s about, as you might guess, the abuse Merope suffered from her father and brother.
In Care (Marlene/OC)
Marlene McKinnon, as a care kid, eventually falls in love with another care kid, Jamal Olawumi. But he's a Muggle, and keeping her world secret proves difficult. This is definitely a story I would like to revisit and tidy up.
Just Across the Bar (Sirius/Rosmerta)
Sirius is just about of age, but obviously Rosmerta has misgivings about having feelings for Sirius, who is still a student. Written for the 2013 Great Hall Cotillion and also smutty.
Written for SPEW 007. My prompt was “Juggling”, and it’s just a silly piece of dialogue-only banter between Remus and Sirius. Sirius realises Remus likes Tonks, and he tries to persuade Remus to act on his feelings.
Hanging by a Thread (Katie/Oliver)
Written for the lovely Jess/ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor for Secret SPEW VII. Katie is grieving and drowning her sorrows in alcohol and Oliver is trying his best to save Muggles, while trying also to bury feelings for Katie that he thought he had long since forgotten about. There is also, surprise surprise, some smut in this.
And that’s it! Along with being a moderator, I’m also a member of SPEWand SBBC. I hope to see you around on the forums; feel free to contact me via PM or review if you have any questions or comments about my stories!
Summary: Harry has an opportunity to view a Pensieve memory of his parents—When Lily overhears James commenting on Remus’s “furry little problem” the Marauders must do some fast talking to get themselves out of a sticky situation.
This was really really funny. You had me in stitches! Nice one. :D
Summary: With wedding preparations in full swing, tensions are high in the Weasley household. Fred and George blow off some steam by casting curses at each other, only to have Bill walk in on their magical mayhem. He decides to settle things down for the rehearsal dinner and casts a spell of his own on the twins. But Fred and George strike back at their older brother, ensuring a night everyone will remember.
This story was written for the One-Shot Challenge: The Twins and received second place.
This was really funny! I laughed out loud. And I loved that Fred and George plotted their revenge!
Author's Response: Thank you for reading this story! It still makes me smile. :) I always meant to write their revenge, but never did. Ah well. I'm glad you enjoyed this one, thank you so much for the review! ~Gina :)
Summary: 2009 QSQ Awards Winner for Best Chaptered Canon Romance
Before the chosen one was ever born, his parents had to meet, fall in love, and defy Voldemort three times. Easier said than done. Things were never easy for Harry Potter's parents, but it gets a whole lot harder when Death Eaters kidnap Lily. This is the story of Lily and James, the trials they face, and how James finally wins Lily's heart. (pre-Deathly Hallows)
“I’ll always protect you.”
Brilliant story, I loved every bit of it! It's the Easter holidays and I've been so bored so it was great that I was kept entertained by your story. Possibly the best fic that I've ever read, and I've read a lot of good fics, let me tell you.
I loved how you included Emmeline Vance - Emma's a great nickname for that as well - and I hated Ted from the beginning, there was just something that made me despise him. James' silly names for Lily made me laugh - my favourite is Pancake and Bunny. You scared me twice when Lily was close to dying! Even though I knew that she had to survive in order to have Harry, I was really scared that somehow she was going to die or something! I really liked the way James proposed to Lily. Sooo romantic!
I'm really getting into the James/Lily ship. I mean, I liked it and all, but I never really read James/Lily fics for some reason. Now I read yours, it encouraged me to read many others, although none have matched your one, which was phenomenal.
Sorry for rambling so much - I've just realised how long this review is! Anyway, keep it up, I love all your stories!
Author's Response: Thanks very much! I never mind a long review! I'm glad I could encourage a love for James and Lily in you -- I definitely adore them and have so much fun reading and writing them. I feel like Emmeline is somewhat of a mouthful so Emma seems like a good alternative to me; I'm glad you agree! And that you liked James and his silly nicknames and his proposal :)
Summary: What does Lord Voldemort do in his spare time? Well, that's an excellent question. Who would have known that the Dark Lord has a blog? (He also has a loyal following of readers, most of whom are Death Eaters and who post their comments.) Voldemort dispenses advice on everything from murder methods to germ protection to Power Rangers to shoes, and gives an account of the life of an evil overlord. But is he posting too much personal information online? And will Harry read it and find out more about the Dark Lord than Voldemort ever intended? Read and see.
WARNING: Extremely OOC behaviour from almost all.
RUNNER-UP in the 2007 Quicksilver Quills Awards for Best Humour fic! Also nominated like 21 times, because apparently my readers are as insane as I am!
This was a really funny story! I've never come across anything quite like it. I liked all the different entries and stuff, it was all really good.
I'll be honest, though: before reading DH at first I did think RAB was Rodolphus and Bellatrix. And I thought I was being really smart and everything! Eventually, though, I did figure out that RAB was actually Regulus Black, even though I didn't know what his middle name was. This was a fabulous humour fic, one of the best I've ever read. Well done!
Summary: It is the end of HBP and Harry sets his eyes on his goals.
This is dedicated to MithrilQuill, who has recently become our (Slytherin's) prefect.
Nicely written. I really like your poems, Cyndi, they're really good. What I like about poetry is that it doesn't take an age to read them. Sometimes I don't have the time to sit down and read a one-shot even, but I want to read something fanfictiony, and I usually choose a poem. You're really talented and I hope that one day I can write poems that are as good as yours. :D
Author's Response: I'm glad that someone is getting some enjoyment from my poems. It has been a long time since anyone has read any of them, and I'm having a lot of fun reading your reviews. :) I know what you mean about having time to read long stories. A lot of my work is pulled from real life, but I have had fun adjusting them to fit on these boards. Thanks again for the great reviews. I'm glad you've had fun reading them. Cyns
Summary: A sonnet that describes Dobby's point of view at the beginning of Chamber of Secrets.
This is for the Sonnet Challenge in the Poetry Anyone section of the Great Hall by Cheshlin in Slytherin House.
Interesting poem and rhyme scheme. I've never come across a sonnet like this one. I always felt sorry for Dobby, he was only trying to help Harry and he couldn't say much anyway, so I think you did a great job with this poem/sonnet.
Author's Response: I wrote this for either a class or a contest a long time ago. It was fun to write, and I have always liked Dobby. Thanks for another great review. :) Cyns
Summary: Sitting alone, Andromeda contemplates the loss of her family, realizing that she is the only survivng member of the Black family.
That was really good. I like how it all rhymes too. Andromeda is by far one of my favourite characters and even though she probably hated her family, she obviously loved them too. I especially like how you explored how none of the Blacks were born bad. They just became bad. Anyway, fabulously written, well done.
Author's Response: Thank you. I love all the Blacks.
Summary: Remus, Peter, Sirius, and James were best friends, but this didn't last forever. The story of the Marauder's summed up in a poem...
Wow...for your first submission that poem was really good. I've never read fanfiction poetry, if I'm honest - I prefer stories over poems. Even so, that poem was brilliant. Well done!
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it, especially if you're more of a story person :)
Summary: Today marks a special day. It was on this day that Teddy Remus Lupin and Victoire Isabella Weasley first went out. A few memories of Teddy’s time at Hogwarts whisk him in to the past throughout the day. He feels that tonight is the perfect night to take his relationship to the next level with Victoire.
The third installment in The Teddy Lupin Files
Aw, how sweet! I've always loved the Teddy/Victoire ship, this is really good!
Summary: Remus Lupin has excellent hearing and he's only come across one thing that he never wants to hear again.
This was written for the SBBC Summer Swap. I have Preethi's wonderful prompt.
That was funny in a way but also pretty sick and disgusting to think of Filch doing ANYTHING with his cat. Although that does explain his attachment to her ... LOL. It was well written. Well done!
Rose was a Weasley. She never gave Scorpius Malfoy a second glance. They were sworn enemies, even though they’d barely even spoken to each other. But sometimes all it takes for love to blossom is a Potions lesson, a few snide remarks and a dropped book.
Two people. Two entirely different worlds that are suddenly intertwined.
A great ending to an absolutely fabulous Scorose fic. My favourite character is definitely Scorpius - I looove blond hair and grey eyes, they're just awesome. I wish it didn't take so long to finish it, but trust me, I know what it's like to get writers block, so I sympathise.
Is it too much to ask for an epilogue similar to the Deathly Hallows one? As in, when Rose and Scorpius and Anna and Albus are married with kids and stuff? I think that would be really really great, if you did something like that. You have a true talent as a writer and I applaud you for your brilliant work!
Author's Response: Thank you so much - Scorpius is one of my favourite characters, too. ;) And I actually considered writing an epilogue, but decided against it because of my next few fics, which will all be compliant with WWC. Scorpius and Rose's wedding will be in my upcoming chaptered fic about Lily, and then when that's finished I'm planning on writing another chaptered fic about Rose and Scorpius after they're married. It won't be based on their relationship like this one, but hopefully you'll enjoy it anyway. Thanks for your reviews on this fic, I really appreciated them all. :) Jen x
Summary: A rallying cry for the Order. I'd like to think that Tonks and Lupin stood in the front of the Great Hall before the final battle, and took turns giving this speech.
Wow! This is great. You've got a great talent of writing few words yet conveying so much power. I wish, as a rather verbose poet, that I had that talent. This is a lovely tribute to Remus and Tonks. Well done!
Summary: Alice is a hopeless romantic. Frank is sensible and down-to-earth and very kind. Can Alice bring herself to look past what she thinks she needs?
Aw, that was so sweet! You know, I never really imagined Frank and Alice to be like Romeo and Juliet but now I come to think about it, you're right! The awkwardness worked, because their personalities have got just enough Neville in them to keep their characters unique. Great story!!
Author's Response: Thank you, Soraya! I really appreciate your review, and I'm glad you could see Neville in their characters. I actually think that they're not at all like Romeo and Juliet, which is something Alice needs to learn and why they are so very cute (romantic they may be, but R&J are not very cute). I like this couple a lot, and I'm glad you enjoyed it! *D*
Summary: An unexpected mission has Sirius teasing Remus about his standards--which leads Remus to do something even more unexpected. (Contains sexual innuendo--but with a title like that, what else would you expect?)
Haha. A nice mix of comedy and romance. A great story, definitely a favourite for me.
Author's Response: Sorry for the late reply! But thank you so much for the review. I'm glad you enjoyed my story and took the time to let me know. I haven't written much R/T recently, and reviews like yours (and the others I've gotten on this story) are making me want to try again. Thanks again!
Summary: This poem goes to James/Lily. In Lily's POV.
Note: Title has been changed due to editing the old version.
Wow! This was brilliant! Trust me when I say that normally, I absolutely HATE poems that don't rhyme. But this seems to be an exception. The wonderful contrast of words ("gently forces") is fabulously done. The poem flows surprisingly well considering it doesn't rhyme. I didn't get to see the old version but I really loved this version. Particularly your word choice--it was just all-round excellence, that's all I can say. I'm a big fan of James/Lily too. I'm in the middle of writing my first ever chaptered James/Lily and I'm glad that you've stayed away from the normal cliches in James/Lily fanfics whether poetry or oneshots or chaptered fics.
The only criticism I can give you is that your tenses seem to be mixed up in two places: when you say "My heart beats" as it should be "beat" as in the past tense, and the same goes for "I am once again, whole" as it should be "I was, once again, whole". However, minor nitpicking aside I loved this poem, so keep up the good work!
Summary: Every morning Ron arrives at the shop and wakes up George with a cup of tea. One morning, however, George doesn't wake up.
This started as a 500 word drabble for my DADA class and turned into a 2000 word one-shot instead, before becoming two chapters. The prompt for my drabble was to use an overdose so be warned that this fic is not a happy one. It is actually I lot darker than I really imagine the Weasley family being after the war, but this is what came out when I started writing and I think it is possible.
please note that the warning is for attempted suicide only
An epilogue has arrived and I promise that I have now finished, though I have found this interesting to write so I may carry on with this version of the Weasley family at some point
Just in case you're wondering, this is Soraya, your SPEW buddy :) My username is a little different on here, for a mundane reason that is far too boring to tell.
So many fics are about how George and the rest of the Weasley family deal with Fred's death. I think, as readers of HP, partly the reason there are so many is because us readers found it so difficult to come to terms with it. I know that I cried when Fred died (unashamedly so, even when my brother laughed at me for being such a softie) so it was interesting to get a fresh perspective on the events.
The first chapter was great. Straight in there with the action, and I love how you substituted sleeping pills/tranquilizers with the sleeping potion. That was very creative, and I think very true. Also, the intertwining of the Muggle and magical hospital stuff was very interesting. I think, post-war, the magical world would finally accept Muggle medicine, which they probably rejected previously due to Voldemort's regime and everything.
George's decision to commit suicide was fully justified and I think (although I'm not a twin myself) that losing a twin is, if not doubly, then at least it is harder than losing a mere sibling, because for a lot of twins, to think of one is to think of the other, and often they feel like their twin is their other half. And I can see how George's (flawed) logic works: if he dies, he can be with his twin. The fact that he was drinking himself into a stupor also works well with the whole angst of it all, and all of it was well done.
Ron -- well, where can I start? There was no arrogance there, no selfishness. And I think that's a fair interpretation to make, given how he took the news of Fred's death right from the very beginning. But you brought out the perseverance in Ron, which is what we saw in DH when he returned to Harry and Hermione, as he tried to stop his brother from drinking. And it was working, or so it seemed. Even George admitted, in the next chapter, that he had promised Ron and that he couldn't break that promise re his drinking. And this, I think, showed that despite everything, George really did consider his brother's feelings.
Arthur's characterisation was spot on. The fact that he was trying his utmost to hold the family together, trying to see the bright side of things, is what he's always done. So this was consistent in this fic, although his sons tried to point out the flaw in his ways. And even then, Arthur, as he always did, was very forgiving, which showed the trust he put in Bill and Percy.
I am not surprised in the slightest that Charlie went off to Romania. That's his forte, dragon-keeping, so it was his way of coping. Percy's change of heart was clearly not taken lightly by all of the Weasleys, like Bill, yet I think they acted in character again. The fact that Bill and Percy barely spoke to each other in all the books speaks volumes about their relationship, and that it probably was a strained one even before Percy abandoned his family.
The second chapter, I think, gave a good insight into George's mind. I have to say, I winced when George was cutting himself. That really scared me. But I read on, because you wrote it sensitively, and your story was too compelling for me not to continue. I think this additional chapter made George's actions seem more understandable, so it was good that you wrote it. And then Fred appeared! I was surprised when Fred pushed him away, but it wasn't OOC. Fred can be serious when he wants to, and you portrayed that very well, while still injected a tiny, tiny dose of humour which made me smile.
The epilogue really did tie up the loose ends. I liked how you still kept the ending open, and yet we were only really left with one question: how would the Weasleys deal with George's suicide attempt, especially George himself? I really liked this fic, overall, and I think it would be great to have a sequel, although that's your choice. Oh, and I forgot to mention this, but the emergency Portkey idea was just genius. Brilliant. Thanks for writing, Hannah/Bob! I'm so honoured to be your SPEW buddy because it meant that I had to read and review one of your stories, which I thoroughly enjoyed!
Summary: True love does not end at death do us part, but lasts forever. Harry and Ginny have had a lifetime together, but what happens beyond then? Follow their last day together on earth.
Take my hand and lead me to salvation. Take my love, for love is everlasting. And remember, the truth that once was spoken, to love another person is to see the face of God. -Les Misérables
I am Merlin_Helz from the Beta boards.
This story has been given a facelift! Why not give it another read?
This was a deeply moving story. I just want to know...well, how did Harry die?
Summary: It is June 1976 and The Marauders are at the top of their game. From the outside they look to have everything.But appearances, as the saying goes, can be deceptive.
James is discovering that not everything in life is his for the taking. Sirius knows he will have to defy his formidable family. Remus lives in constant fear of his life beyond Hogwarts. As for Peter... Well, Peter is struggling to live up to his friends.
The ties of friendship are strong, but war is raging and with a dark power rising those ties will inevitably fray.
Added to the mix is an adversary called Severus Snape, some lost House Points, a prank or two and a whole lot of Lily.
This is a Marauder tale.
This is a story of what made them special.
This is a story of why it started to go wrong for The Lions of Gryffindor.
OH MY GOOD GODRIC! Lions of Gryffindor won the 2009 QSQ for Best Marauders' Era Story. Amazed and incredibly grateful to those who nominated, judged and have beta'd this fic. THANK YOU.
Trick or Treat!
3. She clicks on her mouse and swipes her wand;
Some stories go up, and some stories are gone.
Stories of her own? Why, she has plenty!
Fewer than one-hundred, but far more than twenty.
Ooooooh, Carole, I'm so glad you updated! I've missed reading this :)
I loved the Lily/Peter interaction here. Something that is somewhat a cliche is evil!Peter, so it's nice that you've given him more depth here, especially with Lily encouraging him to not to seem too upset about Sonia and everything.
And Soule is such an arse! Seriously, I just want to punch him. And I have a feeling James is right, that he's a bad guy, and I hope James catches him in the act. Also, on that note, I wonder what will happen to Avery... I have a feeling things will, um, get a bit ugly here.
Anyway, this is a completely useless review, so I shall stop rambling now. Excellent chapter, as always, Carole, and I really hope you update soon (though no pressure, of course :))!
Author's Response: Poor Rich, what has he done to inspire such vitriol - hehehehehheheheheh.
Thank you, Soraya. There is another chapter written, I need to edit and rewrite some bits, then start the next chapter before I submit, though.
Avery .... hmmmmmmm .....
Thanks again. ~Carole~
Oh. My. ROWENA!!! Wow, Carole. I've finally finished reading this, after months of fitting in a chapter wherever I could. I'm sorry I haven't reviewed any of the chapters but I've already committed myself to reviewing every chapter of another story and I didn't have enough time. I adored every bit of it, I can assure you. And this was your first ever fic, wasn't it? I'm incredibly impressed, even though I know just how good your fics are anyway. Still, I saw how your writing simply got better and better the further I read.
The characterisations of the Marauders was fantastic. The little hints of Peter (which would later lead to his betrayal) were subtle yet at the same time just noticeable enough for me to smile knowingly. I'm glad you didn't make Peter cliched like most Marauder writers do -- making him Loser!Peter or Loner!Peter or whatever. Because, at the end of the day, he was one of the four Marauders and James and Lily trusted him, a hell of a lot in my opinion, to be Secret Keeper. That must mean something, surely. So clearly Peter's got to be a good enough friend of James' and Lily's (and I like how Lily is friendlier with Peter than she is Sirius and Remus) for them to put so much trust in him -- even if, later on, he abused the trust, the point is, he must've been a decent person to begin with, in my opinion.
Sirius -- well, what can I say? Martha Macdonald is a lovely character, along with Mary Macdonald, so I liked how you've paired Martha with Sirius. I'm relieved you didn't go overboard with SexGod!Sirius because that would've ruined things; instead, you watered it down a bit so it was made far more believable, and for that I commend you. Sirius still has the arrogance that all members of the Black family have, no matter what house they're in, but it's almost completely drowned out by the goodness in his heart which we know he has.
James and Lily's relationship is also intriguing. I don't know if I've just been ignoring the non-James/Lily parts in Lions, but if you ask me, this has a lot more James/Lily in it than I anticipated because a lot of it is written from James' point of view (even though it's written in third person). Lily's characterisation isn't too uptight, yet she manages to retain her prefect image and self-righteousness while still having fun and bending/breaking the occasional rule. I'm glad that you haven't made her too Hermioneish, at any rate. James' characterisation is delightful -- he's thoughtful and good-hearted, a tiny bit jealous, but he still has the mischievous persona to him, with a touch of arrogance which, if this is possible, is maturing over time.
Onto the story! You've set it up so well, right from the beginning. I was on tenterhooks during the suspenseful chapters and while reading the more emotional ones, I cried and laughed in equal measure. If I could give you more than 10 out of 10 for this, I would. If I had to give a grade for this, it would bypass even A* -- it would be A galaxy! (Or, if you want a named star, A Sirius has a nice ring to it :D)
I'm hoping that James and Sonia break up soon, but I'm guessing this won't be for a few more chapters at least. Once Lily finds out, I'm sure she'll get annoyed and fingers crossed, the two of them will bloody well get together, which is what I'm shouting at them to do. (Not really, of course. Then I would be mad, and I'm not :P)
Seriously, I have read a lot of stories on MNFF that have rendered me speechless, made me cry, made me laugh my arse off, made me smile and made me feel like punching someone/something. Lions of Gryffindor, you'll be pleased to hear, has done all of the above, and that's something that -- other than Harry Potter itself -- no other story has managed to do. You can't hear me but I am applauding you right now for writing such a wonderful story, Carole. I'm waiting eagerly for the next chapter!!
Author's Response: I've taken my time replying to this because I'm really not sure Ican do your review justice. Wow, just wow and thank you so much. This story has been (and still is) a labour of love. I do love the Marauders, but sometimes they make me work hard - ha ha. Now, let me reassure you that I'm a canon girl at heart, so James and Lily are bound to enbd up together ... but I like the journey as well, so it won't be plain sailing. I also hate the James-moping-over-Lily-since-first-year cliche, so I wanted them both to have other people in the meantime. Sirius and Martha could get a bit rocky. Originally, I was going to kill her off, but then I liked her too much and she appeared in Apparently Asleep, so I couldn't kill her - hee hee. You are so right about the arrogance of the Black boys. So similar in some ways, yet so different.
Thank you again fo such a great review. ~Carole~
Oh noooo. Things are getting worse for James, and I think the "bad" side of Rich is coming out. He's such a twat, though, Rich is. I thought it was really mean and sexist of him to say that a boy would be better suited as a Beater. But I can also see how much Lily likes him, so I hope he doesn't try to take advantage of her or anything. We'll see...
And I'm glad James came out with it, though how long Peter won't talk to him for is anyone's guess. Aww, I feel sorry for him now, even if he is a rat >.>
I'm interested to see where this will be going! Sonia, Phyllida, Mary and Martha are some of the best OCs I've come across in fanfic and I think you characterised all of them really well. An excellent chapter as always, Carole. :)
P.S. I did notice a few errors ("ion" instead of "in") and a couple of missing full stops.